Posted on 01/31/2003 5:10:11 AM PST by Stand Watch Listen
"We, the sensible people of the United States, in an attempt to help everyone get along, restore some semblance of justice, avoid any more riots, keep our nation safe, promote positive behavior, and secure the blessings of debt free liberty to ourselves and our great-great-great-grandchildren, hereby try one more time to ordain and establish some common sense guidelines for the terminally whiny, guilt ridden, delusional, and other liberal, bed wetters. We hold these truths to be self-evident: that a whole lot of people are confused by the Bill of Rights and are so dim that they require a Bill of No Rights.
ARTICLE I: You do not have the unearned right to a new car, big screen TV or any other form of wealth. More power to you if you can legally acquire them, but no one is guaranteeing anything.
ARTICLE II: You do not have the right to never be offended. This country is based on freedom, and that means freedom for everyone -- not just you! You may leave the room, turn the channel, express a different opinion, etc., but the world is full of idiots, and probably always will be.
ARTICLE III: You do not have the right to be free from harm. If you stick a screwdriver in your eye, learn to be more careful; do not expect the tool manufacturer to make you and all your relatives independently wealthy.
ARTICLE IV: You do not have the right to free food and housing. Americans are the most charitable people to be found, and will gladly help anyone in need, but we are quickly growing weary of subsidizing generation after generation of professional couch potatoes who achieve nothing more than the creation of another generation of professional couch potatoes.
ARTICLE V: You do not have the right to free health care. That would be nice, but from the looks of public housing, we're just not interested in public health care.
ARTICLE VI: You do not have the right to physically harm other people. If you kidnap, rape, intentionally maim, or kill someone, don't be surprised if the rest of us want to see you fry in the electric chair.
ARTICLE VII: You do not have the right to the possessions of others. If you rob, cheat or coerce away the goods or services of other citizens, don't be surprised if the rest of us get together and lock you away in a place where you still won't have the right to a big screen color TV or a life of leisure.
ARTICLE IX: You do not have the right to a job. All of us sure want you to have a job, and will gladly help you along in hard times, but we expect you to take advantage of the opportunities of education and vocational training laid before you to make yourself useful.
ARTICLE X: You do not have the right to happiness. Being an American means that you have the right to PURSUE happiness -- which by the way, is a lot easier if you learn the Country's language and are unencumbered by an overabundance of idiotic laws created by those of you who were confused by the Bill of Rights."
If you agree with the foregoing, share it with a friend. No, you don't have to, and nothing tragic will befall you if you don't. I just think it is about time common sense is allowed to flourish -- call it the age of reason revisited - Live Each Day With an Attitude of GRATITUDE!
Social Contract
Edited for your enjoyment by Richard B. Boddie
(original author unknown)
Between, YOU, an individual and The Omnipotent United States Government:
WHEREAS, I wish to reside on the North American continent, and WHEREAS, the United States of America's Government controls the geographical area of the continent on which I wish to reside, and WHEREAS, tacit or implied contracts are vague and therefore unenforceable,
I hereby agree to the following specific terms and conditions:
SECTION 1: I will surrender a percentage of my property to the Government. The actual percentage will be determined by that Government and will be subject to change at any time. The actual amount to be surrendered may be based upon my income, the value of my honestly acquired property, the value of my purchases, or any other criteria that the Government so chooses. To aid the Government in determining the percentage, I will apply for a Government identification number that I will use in all my major financial transactions (as well as for many other unnamed uses).
SECTION 2: Should the Government demand it, I will surrender my personal liberty for an unspecified period of time to be determined solely by the government, but typically no shorter than two years. During that time, I will serve the Government in any way it chooses, including military service in which I may be called upon to sacrifice my life.
SECTION 3: I will limit my behavior as demanded by the Government. I will only consume those drugs permitted by the Government. I will limit my sexual activities to those permitted by the Government. I will forsake any religious beliefs that conflict with the Government's determination of propriety. More limits may be imposed at any time, at the sole discretion of the Government.
SECTION 4: In consideration for the above, the Government will permit me to find employment, subject to limits that will be determined by it, not me. These limits may restrict my choice of career or the wages I may or may not accept.
SECTION 5: The Government will permit me to reside in the area of North America that it controls. Also, the Government will permit me to speak freely, but subject to limits determined by the Government's Congress and its Supreme Court at any given time.
SECTION 6: The Government will attempt to protect my life as well as my claim to the property it has allowed me to keep. I agree not to hold the Government liable if it fails to protect me or my property.
SECTION 7: The Government will offer various services to me. The nature and extent of these services will be determined by the Government and are subject to change at any time.
SECTION 8: The Government will determine whether I may vote for certain Government officials or not. The influence of said vote will vary inversely with the number of voters voting at a given election, and I understand that it typically will be minuscule at best. And I also agree to not hold any elected Government officials liable for acting against my best interests or for breaking any of their promises, even if those promises actually in fact motivated me to vote for him or her.
SECTION 9: I agree that the Government may hold me fully liable if I fail to abide by any of the above terms and conditions, while it shall be held harmless whenever it fails to abide by its obligations in this agreement. In the event that I fail to abide by any provisions herein, the Government may confiscate any property that I have not already previously surrendered to it, and may imprison me for a period of time to be determined by it. And I further agree that the Government may alter the terms of this contract at any time, and in its discretion, may even kill me for any breach of these conditions that it alone has determined that I have caused.
________________________L.S.
___________________ My Signature Date
_________________________L.S.
___________________ ________________ Governmental Official's Title Date Signature
The following was written by State Representative Mitchell Kaye from Cobb County, GA.and other sites citing sameThe following thought provoking article was written by Lewis Napper.and with othe sites citing same
ARTICLE VIII: You do not have the right to demand that our children risk their lives in foreign wars to soothe your aching conscience. We hate oppressive governments and won't lift a finger to stop you from going to fight if you'd like. However, we do not enjoy parenting the entire world and do not want to spend so much of our time battling each and every little tyrant with a military uniform and a funny hat.
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