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How to be a Jack Mormon
The Cultural Hall Podcast ^ | June 9, 2012 | Carli

Posted on 06/16/2012 11:00:56 AM PDT by greyfoxx39

A Jack Mormon is someone who is Mormon, but ”trouble.”

They are somewhere in between baptism and excommunication. If they even show up to church, they’re merely in the door, not on the stand, but also not escorted out. Foyer sitters.

(That’s how I’ve heard the term used anyway.)

In order to be a successful Jack Mormon, you need to incorporate multiple items from the following list into your life:

Are Jack Mormons a misunderstood part of Mormon culture? Or are Jack Mormons simply misinformed about what’s appropriate in Mormon culture?


TOPICS: General Discusssion; Humor; Religion & Culture
KEYWORDS: antimormon; christian; inman; mormon; rulesforsalvation
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To: svcw; wintertime

I would rather have someone come to church in a miniskirt and 6in heels (hooker heels) or high/drunk who needs to hear the Gospel than stay home. If they become disruptive that is another problem, but that is a problem no matter how you are dressed or your mental state.

The Sunday my best friend accepted Christ she was reluctant to go to church with us because she was visiting from San Deigo and didn’t have any ‘church clothes’. I told her jeans, tshirt and flip flops were fine - and they were. That Sunday changed her entire life, because that was the Sunday she heard the Gospel of Grace and accepted Christ wearing jeans, tshirt and flip flops.


81 posted on 06/16/2012 5:30:11 PM PDT by reaganaut (Ex-Mormon, now Christian "I once was lost, but now am found, was blind but now I see")
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To: Springfield Reformer

Well said and your response to him was much better than mine.


82 posted on 06/16/2012 5:33:22 PM PDT by reaganaut (Ex-Mormon, now Christian "I once was lost, but now am found, was blind but now I see")
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To: reaganaut; greyfoxx39; colorcountry; P-Marlowe; SENTINEL; SZonian
“I’m the apostate your bishop warned you about.”

LOL, maybe I'll have some made. Or a bumper sticker would also be cool.

83 posted on 06/16/2012 5:45:51 PM PDT by Utah Binger (Southern Utah where the world comes to see America)
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To: reaganaut

Amen


84 posted on 06/16/2012 5:49:09 PM PDT by svcw (If one living cell on another planet is life, why isn't it life in the womb?)
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To: Utah Binger

Bumper stickers would rock too...


85 posted on 06/16/2012 5:53:18 PM PDT by reaganaut (Ex-Mormon, now Christian "I once was lost, but now am found, was blind but now I see")
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To: ansel12

Really a good thing probably. I wouldn’t want to see my daughter’s genitals rubbed with oil by a stranger. (If they still do that)


86 posted on 06/16/2012 5:53:28 PM PDT by svcw (If one living cell on another planet is life, why isn't it life in the womb?)
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To: greyfoxx39

•Church apparel, for men: Wear jeans and any shirt color other than white to church. No tie. Tennis shoes.
•Church apparel, for women: Wear a sleeveless top and a mini skirt. Never wear panty hose. Wear flip flops in the summer and hooker heels in the winter.
______________________________________________

Talk about legalistic...

Ive worn jeans, colored shirts, sneakers, flip flops, no panty hose, etc to church...

God never fell off His throne...


87 posted on 06/16/2012 6:01:22 PM PDT by Tennessee Nana (Why should I vote for Bishop Romney when he hates me because I am a Christian)
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To: reaganaut; unkus

Unkus is not interested in the truth.

He knows some Mormons.

He has never had a problem with any of them.

Therefore Mormonism is just fine with him.

That settles it.

BTW I know a lot of Muslims. I have never had a problem with any of them. Based on Unkus’ logic, I should conclude that Islam is not a problem.


88 posted on 06/16/2012 6:26:55 PM PDT by P-Marlowe (Virgil Goode! Because everyone else is Bad!)
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To: greyfoxx39
Bring iced tea, caffeinated soda to the potluck

Usually I dont have to...its already there supplied by the church...

Bring a cup of coffee .

again its supplied by the church...though I did bring a large can of Maxwell House for the church kitchen this week...does that count ???

Pop open a can of Pringles

I dont like Pringles...will any other brand do ???

Eat McDonalds in the parking lot before church

Sharia law thingy ???

Throw the trash away in the can outside of the chapel

Sounds like TRs throw their trash on the ground...OK..

Attend church high or hung over

Mormons just dont go in for that Acts 2 stuff eh ???

Clap after the intermediary musical number

If it were such a place Id be going to the mormon outer darkness for sure...

Cross-dress for the Halloween Trunk-or-Treat

What does it matter how the mormons dress to celebate a night of the devil ??? Christians dont celebrate Halloween...

Never address other members as brother or sister

I thought we were clear on that cross dressing thing...now ya want to reverse the rule ???

89 posted on 06/16/2012 6:28:12 PM PDT by Tennessee Nana (Why should I vote for Bishop Romney when he hates me because I am a Christian)
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To: greyfoxx39

Even if the LORD Jesus Christ could answer all those TR Qs with the required words

That long hair past His ear lobes and the beard are a deal breaker...


90 posted on 06/16/2012 6:44:46 PM PDT by Tennessee Nana (Why should I vote for Bishop Romney when he hates me because I am a Christian)
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To: Ruy Dias de Bivar

We had a Jerk Mormon in the military. If he had been a baptist he would still have been a jerk.
____________________________________________________

I nev er did meet up w2ith a mormon in the 7 years I was in the military

but then I was in during Nam...

But after I got out and went to college and graduated i took the LSAT...

Just before the test started there was the sloppiest fat guy in a USAF uniform who got up and in a few words proved himself a jerk mormon...

He said “Im a mormon” and I could hear people in the packed room say to one another “Whats a mormon ???”

He said that he had just flown back to the US from Germany where he was stationed just for that occaision...the test that morning at a “gentile” university..

I was wishing I was back in the Air Force and still an NCO...I would have busted the little creep for his dress..and for unbecoming conduct etc...

He went on to say that none of us would get a good score in the test...we were all going to fail...

By that timne the girls were gasping and the jocks were clenching their fists in the direction of his cowardly white butt...

He crowed that before he got on the plane his “bishop” had prayed for him and had assured him that he was the only one of us that would get a score good enough for law school...

That did it...

Girls cried in dismay and men moved towards him...

But just then the instructor came in and saved his sorry stupid hide...

Shame...


91 posted on 06/16/2012 7:16:43 PM PDT by Tennessee Nana (Why should I vote for Bishop Romney when he hates me because I am a Christian)
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To: reaganaut

I already have a TShirt for Utah

GIVEN ENOUGH COFFEE I COULD RULE THE WORLD

:)


92 posted on 06/16/2012 7:27:22 PM PDT by Tennessee Nana (Why should I vote for Bishop Romney when he hates me because I am a Christian)
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To: P-Marlowe; unkus

I can take your logic one step further, Marlowe....

The Muslims I know are better, more conservative, and more honest people (seriously) than the Mormons I know. And Muslims have never sent me death threats...Mormons have.


93 posted on 06/16/2012 7:28:59 PM PDT by reaganaut (Ex-Mormon, now Christian "I once was lost, but now am found, was blind but now I see")
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To: Tennessee Nana

LOL. That would be a great one.


94 posted on 06/16/2012 7:31:49 PM PDT by reaganaut (Ex-Mormon, now Christian "I once was lost, but now am found, was blind but now I see")
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To: Tennessee Nana

95 posted on 06/16/2012 7:38:09 PM PDT by Utah Binger (Southern Utah where the world comes to see America)
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To: Utah Binger; Tennessee Nana

BEST COFFEE IN THE WORLD!!!


96 posted on 06/16/2012 7:41:59 PM PDT by reaganaut (Ex-Mormon, now Christian "I once was lost, but now am found, was blind but now I see")
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To: reaganaut

When she accepted the Gospel did her behavior and appearance change?


97 posted on 06/16/2012 7:55:33 PM PDT by wintertime (Reforming a government K-12 school is like reforming an abortion mill.)
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To: wintertime; svcw

Her behavior, certainly, although she was nearly a saint before. She still wears jeans and tshirts though, of course so do I.

A dress code is not a requirement for salvation.


98 posted on 06/16/2012 8:28:46 PM PDT by reaganaut (Ex-Mormon, now Christian "I once was lost, but now am found, was blind but now I see")
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To: jjotto
Thank you for the info update. Not good...I knew the Reform sect were very liberal and now the Conservative? not good...The Orthodox are far to wrapped in the Talmud which is what Yahshua came against when He was here the first time. “The works of the law” referenced in the NT were the rabbinical extras put on the mitzvot to make sure the Ten Commandments were not violated. Oy Vey... so where should a good Jewish Messiah go to worship if He should stop in some week end? not good...
99 posted on 06/16/2012 8:29:19 PM PDT by ladyL
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To: ansel12

They obviously are trying to do Bible things in Bible ways :)


100 posted on 06/16/2012 8:31:40 PM PDT by ladyL
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