Pentagon Spends $100,000 to Find Out: ‘Did Jesus Die for Klingons Too?’

Christian News Network ^ | November 16, 2012 | Heather Clark

[Alex Murphy]

In addition to $1.5 billion being spent on a plan to invent roll-up beef jerky, an iPhone app that helps people schedule their coffee breaks and scientific research on the swimming patterns of goldfish, was a workshop blending Christianity with the existence of aliens.

The event, entitled “Did Jesus Die for Klingons Too?,” focused on “the implications for Christianity if intelligent life were to be found on other planets.” According to the Global Post, actors such as LeVar Burton and Nichelle Nichols were present, and an “intergalactic gala celebration” was included, at which attendees were urged to don “starship cocktail attire”....

....While Coburn’s report outlines that the government is proceeding with its plans for the roll-up jerky, as “a variety of flavors are being developed, including salami, chipotle, turkey, pork and smoked ham,” it is not known whether it came to a conclusion by the end of its workshop as to how Jesus’ death would apply to aliens if they indeed exist.

The Klingon Rite of Ascension requires that the initiate walk between two rows of warriors armed with pain sticks. This is sometimes called The Way of Blood. It is a test of a warrior's commitment and courage. Christ satisfied this requirement and much, much more. And this act was no punishment for a criminal, as the Romans intended, nor was it a rite that had only a symbolic meaning. Christ did not run from this pain; he welcomed it. His sacrifice was an act of will. In this crucifixion, Christ defeated his enemies. And this is what makes him a suitable savior for the Klingon as well as the human and all races.
-- from the 2009 thread Klingons for Christ

[teflon9]

The event, entitled “Did Jesus Die for Klingons Too?,”

---

Whoever thought of that event needs to get out of his mom’s basement, pronto!

[Carriage Hill]

...don “starship cocktail attire”...

I really don’t want/need to know anything further, thankyouverymuch.

[Wyrd bið ful aræd]

Did they manage to invent roll up beef jerky?

[Carriage Hill]

Fruit-flavored, no less.

[annieokie]

The event, entitled “Did Jesus Die for Klingons Too?,”""".......

Well, Yes as a matter of fact HE did, but the Democrats refused him 3 times.....and still counting.

[Carriage Hill]

Bet you could have done this study for only $50k Ping.

[faithhopecharity]

Now that we know about this, you can bet the MuslimBrotherInChief will put an end to it. Can’t have anything that even remotely appears to acknowledge or support Christianity, after all...

[CrazyIvan]

This could be an interresting conversation between Sheldon Cooper and his mother.

[Wyrd bið ful aræd]

[Berlin_Freeper]

While or military is trying to settle this question - the space aliens are out there planning how to wipe us out.

[Carriage Hill]

Hi ya, Smiley! Good boy...

[GeronL]

All that money to invent beef jerkey... all they have to do is buy Slim Jim, they could probably have bought the company for that!!

The Jesus thing is crazy... who did this? Can these people be fired?

[cgbg]

If the aliens were trying to wipe us out they would just drop counterfeit cash out of flying saucers and wait for the economy to crash.

[Godzilla]

16 vaD joH'a' vaj loved the qo', vetlh ghaH nobta' Daj wa' je neH puqloD, vetlh 'Iv HartaH Daq ghaH should ghobe' chIlqu', 'ach ghaj eternal yIn.

[ArrogantBustard]

Meanwhile, the Department of Health and Human Services has a $78 Billion budget dedicated wholly to taking money from the productive and giving it to the unproductive.

The Department of Education has a $71 Billion budget dedicated to indoctrinating children in communism and faggotry.

The Environmental Protection Agency has a $8 Billion budget dedicated wholly to harassing productive citizens and corporations.

This is crazy... who did this? Can these people be fired?

[GreyFriar]

At no cost to the DoD: The answer is YES. Jesus died for the redemption of all of us created by God. I figure that God may not have begun or stopped with creating only us. Thus His Son is for all of us, where ever we are in His universe.

[allmendream]

Giordano Bruno, 1548-1600, figured that there must be many more inhabited worlds than this one, and that there must be a pathway to salvation offered up to any that had the intelligence to recieve it - thus many billions of Christs to offer salvation to many billions of worlds. He was burned at the stake for heresy.

[GeronL]

I totally agree, of course

[Alex Murphy]

Giordano Bruno, 1548-1600, figured that there must be many more inhabited worlds than this one, and that there must be a pathway to salvation offered up to any that had the intelligence to recieve it - thus many billions of Christs to offer salvation to many billions of worlds. He was burned at the stake for heresy.

I can think of two things wrong with the above statement.