I have never liked Al Gore. I always found him stiff, wooden and robotic, much like my debut performance in “Model Man.” This is largely the fault of his handlers, the media and “Saturday Night Live.” They mocked him for claiming to have invented the internet. They parodied his mirthless speaking voice. They made funny little cartoon drawings of his hawk-like nose and small eyes. I fell for it. I fell hard, like a blind kid taking the stairs. But now I know differently. Al Gore isn’t stiff and droll — he’s sexy. A sexy robot, like Jessica Simpson. And...