The paper towel in the freezer to cool a beer does not work.
Not.
Not.
That was disappointing. I am always trying to find a way to get a beverage colder, quicker without putting ice IN it, and thought this would fill the bill. But...didn’t work so I didn’t try any of the others.
But, you know what WILL cool a beer down quickly? Fill a large bowl with ice, pour in a tablespoon or two of salt, add water and beers. Swirl around and let set, and in less than 10 minutes, you have an ice cold beer.
THAT works, because I have done it.
if’you stir it for several minutes with the cans in there they can get ice cold faster than ten minutes.
I used the salt and ice trick, just weeks ago.
Using heat for evaporative cooling doesn't work, but a CO2 fire extinguisher works great on a 6-pack of cans. Except for the $30 to recharge the thing.
I think they settled on pouring the beer through a coil immersed in iced water ending up in a glass.
I recall some ads for a gimmicky motorized horizontal can spinner that you put a couple/three cubes on the can and set it a spinnin' for a minute or two.
Oh, and the Rocket City Rednecks tricked out a motor home including adding a LN2 beer cooler for their Talledega tailgating show.