Posted on 03/05/2009 5:19:28 PM PST by flowerplough
It's a classic case of mean-girl syndrome, where cliques are formed and isolation sets in for anyone not included in the popular circle. But this is not the playground--it's the workplace. According to a study conducted last year by the Workplace Bullying Institute and Zogby International, an astounding 71 percent of office conflict cases are women bullying other women.
"I'm not at all surprised by the findings," says David Thomas, professor of business administration and chairman of the Organizational Behavior department at Harvard Business School. "If you think about the kind of bullying that goes on between [women], which is often more psychological, more subtle, more in the form of social putdowns, that's the kind of bullying that happens in the workplace."
In fact, women bully other women 2.5 times more frequently than they target men, preferring to use sabotage and abuse of authority as their forms of bullying. In addition, women who bully in the workplace prefer to do it behind closed doors and are slightly more likely than men to enlist the help of others to "gang up" on their targets.
( ... )
But why do more women bully?
"Sometimes gender and race cause people to treat others like the roles that they had traditionally been in as opposed to identifying specifically what their role is," says Young. "When you have been the recipient of treatment that denies you equal opportunity, sometimes people--not [just] women, but people--will overcompensate."
(Excerpt) Read more at diversityinc.com ...
I generally hate to work with women in leadership...and I am a woman who has a lot of leadership roles. I would much rather have a man be my supervisor. Of course, there are exceptions!
Some certainly are “affected”
My canned (male) response: “I really don’t know her that well. I’m sorry about the situation. Look, I’ve got a telecon in a few minutes. I’ll talk to you later.”
I can relate to this. My last boss was a lady and the cliques she had were a pain in the butt. If you were not from the “in” crowd, you were toast.
Four weeks ago, I accepted a new job (with higher pay and bennies) and came into her office to give my two weeks notice. The look on her face was one not to forget. :)
I was one of those verbally mean nasty girls in my youth, much to my shame. But I'll tell you, when I see it now in grown up women it is UGLY and I avoid those types.
Anyone who’s taught in elementary school can tell you that the more vicious and hateful behavior is dished out by little girls, rather than little boys. They are also much sneakier and better at deception. If there is good character training, they can be made more civil, however, many adult women were never made to face the consequences of their hateful conduct and carry it throughout their lives leaving wrecked relationships along the way.
[In fact, women bully other women 2.5 times more frequently than they target men]
I’m not at all surprised at this and agree with your comments.
I only worked a few years but would prefer a man as my ‘boss’. Women can be envious of those who are smarter, prettier and better off, but they will often pick on just the opposite in a very mean way. I’ve never understood it.
I totally believe this. In my last job, my female supervisor was a nightmare. She didn’t even try to hide her hatred and contempt for certain employees (me included) - but we never knew why she had these feelings. She would literally make up things to try and get us in trouble and pass them along to our general manager. Thankfully I was able to calmly and clearly prove to the GM that the supervisor was in the wrong, but it took up a lot of time and energy to do so. And only made the supervisor angrier.
She should have been fired numerous times but because of certain quotas to be filled at this contract, she probably could have walked in with a butcher knife and nothing would have happened.
They tend to be wimpy when it comes to dealing with inter-office conflict. Especially if it is between two women.
Not to say that there aren't wimpy female supervisors as well but they are about 50/50 while with guys it is almost 100%. I don't get it. The job of the boss is to keep the group going in the same direction with minimal fuss. But there seem to be few bosses who are able to do that effectively.
From what I understand, most bosses are terrified of lawsuits, EEOC filings, discrimination complaints and worse. When my husband was a supervisor a couple of years ago, he’d have stories that would make you shake your head in disbelief. Just try and discipline an unruly employee and you’ll get a complaint notice of “discrimination” within a week.
To give you an idea of the sense of dread, a lot of mornings I crossed the parking lot half hoping a heart attack would drop me so I wouldn't have to face the evil incarnate. Her craziness would not be tolerated where I am. I saw the normal groups with normal supervisors and it got depressing seeing my situation.
I am happy for you and glad to know that a PHB-ette out there has one less person to oppress.
I went through the clique thing and hated it. If you were in the clique, you really had nothing to worry about. If not, it didn't matter. The main clique theme was "girl power!" to the nth degree.
On one of my last days there, I paid a visit to an admin type to turn in a time sheet. She was happy for me. At the time she remarked that I worked for an "evil woman." Looking back, she was right. Sadly somehow, nothing bad will probably happen to her at her position. I normally don't wish ill will on anyone but I hope she gets cut, loses everything, and kicked to the street with her whole dysfunctional family.
Because they're catty, vindictive harpies?
I had two black women, both younger than me, who got in an argument because I removed "Mydol" from the first aid kit. The argument was whether or not "Mydol" was actually needed by women.
I was forced to remove the medication by company policy, but I sure didn't want to step into that cat-fight. I did, eventually and reluctantly.
I got a dose of double standard of being able to say what is on your mind around there.
I TOTALLY believe this, and I am a woman. At my last job, the office was run by two women (one of whom would remind you uncannily of a Nazi prison matron), and the place was a dysfunctional hellhole. My current office is run by two men, and we’re all like peas and carrots (to quote the sagacious Forrest Gump).
Most of the world never truly leaves the playground.
Ok, wow, I just have to ask...
You don’t have to give names or specifics, but could give an example of the Evil Behavior? I am quite curious...
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