Well done please.
Posted on 06/01/2006 10:11:12 PM PDT by pcottraux
Celebrities roast actress Jane Fonda
By GREG BLUESTEIN, Associated Press Writer 1 hour, 38 minutes ago
ATLANTA - Actress Jane Fonda was on the wrong end of a celebrity roast Thursday, the target of spirited insults from actresses, comedians and — horror of horrors — her ex-husband. ADVERTISEMENT
CNN founder Ted Turner was among the celebrities who zinged the two-time Oscar winner to raise hundreds of thousands of dollars for the Georgia Campaign for Adolescent Pregnancy Prevention, a group that aims to suppress the state's teenage pregnancy rate.
"She's one of the most beautiful women I've met," said the billionaire businessman. "She must have been — I gave up three mistresses for her."
He went on to poke fun at his "favorite ex-wife," who has been married three times, for the array of relatives at her family gatherings. "I didn't know if it was Christmas or the Jerry Springer Show," he quipped.
Fonda, wearing a form-fitting red dress, took the jibes from Turner and others in good humor, although she confessed her reluctance to take part in the event before the show.
"I've offered my body and my flesh for the sake of (the charity). And I'm scared to death," she said as she walked the red carpet arm-in-arm with Turner.
That's not all she offered. An Andy Warhol portrait of Fonda from her art collection was among a handful of high-dollar items up for auction before the event.
The gala, held at the Georgia Aquarium, brought out a host of celebrities and politicians, including former President Carter, talk show host Rosie O'Donnell, rapper Big Boi and comedian Chris Tucker.
Fonda, who smirked from her throne at center stage throughout the roast, was dubbed "America's best-looking grandmother" by host Larry King — partly, he said, because she's someone who has "undergone more reconstruction than Fallujah."
For the comedians, Fonda's political activities protesting the Vietnam War — including the infamous picture of her beside a North Vietnam anti-aircraft gun in 1972 — were ripe for jokes.
"If you really want to" anger people today, intoned comedian Wanda Sykes, "you should go and get your picture taken on top of an Exxon station."
Not all the guests drew laughs. Actor Peter Fonda told a series of rambling, disjointed stories about his older sister, ending in tears, saying: "I wouldn't miss this night for the world." Then he hugged Jane and Turner.
Other guests ended their monologues with an uplifting message, encouraging Fonda to continue her fighting spirit.
"Keep helping us, Obi-Wan Fonda," said actress Carrie Fisher, who played Princess Leia in the Star Wars series. "You're our only hope."
YAAAY!
What? They didn't cook her over an open fire, they told jokes and stuff? Oh. :(
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That's not what she meant by "offering her body and flesh for the sake of charity."
Larry King, for a liberal, is relatively un-obnoxious. Can I get an amen? (Think of the competition...)
BLECH!!!!
If she's our only hope, I'm jumping out of a window.
Not the kind of guy you'd picture as being very good at a roast.
Roast pig?
I'll bet she goes great with Heinz ketchup.
Celebrities Roast Actress Jane Fonda
Even that would be more humane than how the North Vietnamese soldiers that she just LOOOOVED treated captured U.S. prisoners.
But that's just what they want you to do!
This 'woman' spends millions annually supporting radical left causes
General Giap would have loved to have been there.
On an open fire?!
Well done please.
I mean, give a guy his due. On the issues, I agree with him about 3% of the time, but I still sort of like him. Compare him to, say, Alan Keyes, who is right 97% of the time, but drives even his allies away!
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