Those poor abused loyalists often earned the hatred of their neighbors long before the revolution. In my family genealogy research we’ve come across loyalists rewarded for turning in neighbors who were problematic for the crown. Things like being stripped of property or livestock which were awarded to loyalists. Sometimes my distant ancestors were loyalists who did it themselves.
Especially in the south, as I'm sure you know the war was more akin to a civil war than a revolution. In such a situation, brutality is bound to ensue -- just the way it is.
A lot of killin’, burning, and scalping.