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Not when the kids are throwing them at the front door because it’s the first Halloween where you’re in your own place and you didn’t buy enough candy to hand out because you didn’t know there were so many kids in the neighborhood so you turned off the porch light and hid behind the couch while the little angels were outside in a mob screaming “We know you’re in there and we want candy!” and you start to wonder if maybe you can give them cans of Campbell’s Chicken With Stars soup but you realize they’d probably throw the soup cans at the window and what kid walks around with eggs on Halloween and then you see your neighbor Bob out behind his pickup handing out eggs to the kids so you forget there are kids with eggs out there waiting for you and you open the front door and some kid who’s going to grow up to be a Cy Young winner pelts you in the puss with an egg and you get yolk up your nose and pass out because you can’t breathe and Bob is giving the kids a can of gasoline and some matches and the police come and haul you off for frightening children and you have to call your wife at work to come and bail you out and she’s there at the front of the police station tapping her foot with her arms crossed because she married a man who frightens children and you ride home in silence to find that Bob gave the kids magic markers and they wrote swear words that even you didn’t know on your door and your wife hands you a pail of soapy water and a rag and says to not let the already dried eggs dry on the door because they’ll be harder to get off and they are and you’re trying to wipe off the dirty words and dried eggs while thinking about stuffing eggs and magic markers down Bob’s throat. So, sometimes eggs aren’t so good.

you can give them cans of Campbell’s Chicken With Stars soup

LOL!! I thought about zip-locks of craisens!

I buy a candy package with a lot of Butterfingers and hold them back. Grind them up later and use them in a Butterfinger pie given to me by a Hatfield. Americana.

Your post was a hoot!