Posted on 09/15/2017 8:15:38 PM PDT by BJ1
If we get straight to the point and skip the BS that’s only used to soften the blow of painful facts, we can admit it’s hard to find a good man. Even if we take our standards, expectations, and delusional hopes off the table and really look at the situation for what it is, we can clearly see that we are not to blame for the lack of good men. No, we have society who can take the blame for this one.
Unfortunately, our culture has evolved in a way that has made finding a good man tough ― and they certainly don’t make them like they used to. So, why is it so damn hard to find an awesome guy who’s going to treat you right and not bail the first time temptation comes his way? Here are nine reasons.
1. Hookup culture has taken over. Although I would never knock hooking up, it has replaced dating and even relationships. Men don’t want to be with one woman only, if they have an entire buffet at their disposal.
2. People have too many options. While it’s good to have options, it can be bad when there are too many options. At any given moment a guy can sit down at a dating app and immediately have endless options of women from which to choose. Because of that, it’s hard for them to give one woman a shot for more than a hot minute.
3. Lots of guys are holding out for something “better.” It’s a sad thought, but in a world with so many options, people can become immersed in the idea that something better might be just around the corner. Because that’s the case, it’s hard to find a man who wants to commit when they’re thinking that the next woman they meet could be perfect ― whatever perfect is.
4. Marriage is becoming obsolete. Once upon a time, people couldn’t wait to get married. Although it was likely due to the fact that they would finally be able to have sex, the reality is that these days people are in no rush to get married, so therefore, they’re in no rush to get into a relationship or settle down. And if a guy’s friends aren’t married, he sure as hell won’t be the first one to do it.
5. Some men are intimidated by power. In comparison to the past few decades, women are more independent than ever. This success and power, for some reason, can be intimidating for some men who, perhaps, realize that they’ll never be the “man” his female partner is.
6. Technology has created distance. How can anyone possibly find a good man or anyone at all when we live in a world where technology rules and our most intimate relationships are with our iPhones? We can’t.
7. The “man-child” is a legitimate problem. A man-child is a just modern day term for a man who suffers from Peter Pan Syndrome: He does not want to grow up. If he grows up, he’d have to become responsible, get his act together, and even maybe find a girl and fall in love. Too many men just don’t want to do that.
8. Everyone has their baggage. No one is immune to having a rocky past, and sometimes that past can interfere with how that person moves forward ― if they move forward at all. Messy baggage can keep even the great guys in hiding for a long time.
9. Being phobic of commitment is accepted. We live in a world where being scared of commitment has simply become the norm. If a man doesn’t want to commit, people are rarely surprised. Since that’s the case, they’ll just keep on skipping out on commitment and sticking to hookup culture, because it’s so accepted.
While there is something to the whole cow, milk, free argument, I don’t think people should get married because they feel lust, but the mores are chaste, and the wedding will bring instant sex. There is something to be said for choosing well, including sexual compatibility.
Let’s boil this down to the basics. Somewhere along the line, women relinquished their power and started screwing around rather aimlessly.
Why buy the milk, you stupid cows?
>>> I know I probably picked wrong with both my husbands. I didn’t know any better.<<<
I read an article some time back about the formula for happiness. Which was nothing more than a comparison of where your life is now, vs. your expectations. You could be a poor student and happy, as you don’t expect to not be poor. But if circumstances don’t change 10 years later you’d be unhappy. Aren’t women being told as girls to expect so much in life that isn’t really possible for most?
And that is the reason I think women tend to be more unhappy nowadays. They have been sold on a this fruity thinking that the world is their oyster....and part of that is having sex with lotsa men instead of settling down right away. Another bad move that lowers your odds of a happy marriage.
Men, meh they have tried to compromise with the new ways. They accept the short hair, the heavier weight, the added responsibility at home women expect. And yet women still are liable to be unhappy and give them the “I’m not in love with you anymore” speech. So men react and are less interested in marriage.
Yet it could be so much better if men and women just had more realistic expectations, viewed marriage as permanent and didn’t sleep around before marriage.
I saw that way too many times in my 20 years in the military.
HOMESTEAD rules over all.
It rules over marital law and child protection. A lawyer explained it to me in a very lengthly conversation. Popped my eyes wide open.
BUT, he said, Homestead is NOT discussed, it is censored, a lawyer can be attacked if they are too loud about it, it is covered up. But homestead is still law.
Homestead is numero uno, but lied about & denied to the max. But you must find a brave lawyer, and do lots of homework. It denies much power to the judiciary. Even mentioning it is frowned upon.
So you were likely denied on a technicality. Or needed the right lawyer. And the house may still be yours.
A lawyer, hush hush, spoke the forbidden words to me. It makes sense because Big Judiciary wants to keep control over men and the best way is illegally deny home ownership turning him back into a slave.
ALWAYS HOMESTEAD !
Picked wrong.
We choose the person who causes us the most pain. We repeat that until we really do learn the lessons.
My next wife will be from before the 1950's as soon as I get the time machine online.
There was no reason to read any further. If this is the mindset this woman has, no wonder she has trouble landing a good man.
If I were kicked to the curb, never again.
People with visible tattoos that cannot be covered by clothing (face, neck, hands) scream to the world that they did a stretch in the jailhouse (whether they actually did or not). Most respectable companies just will not hire them.
In the years ahead, I think a big industry will be tattoo removal!
You nailed it!
So just about everything she listed is a critique of moving away from religious, traditional cultural norms.
That said, my son 22, has been to three weddings of his peers this summer... with more to come.
The couples seem to have their grandfather’s and even great-grandparents view of life. And getting married and settling down seems to be a big part of it.
They are not all religious, but many are, and they all are committed to a future and a pretty conservative way of life.
Many years ago there was a film called Blast From the Past. In it was a young man who had been brought up isolated with fifties values. One of the more poignant parts of the film was when a 90’s homosexual character looked at the young mans stalwart values with wistfulness.
Resting Bitch Face: A person, girl especially, whose regular facial expression makes them look like a bitch.
-Urban Dictionary
Regards,
at age 14 your daughter’s wishes will be taken into consideration.
In most of my family work, a fourteen year old child who refuses to stay with one parent or refuses to leave another parent’s house, is not forced by courts to change house.
See what this is like in your area.
Amen, Brother.
Tony Asher: "When I was working on Wouldn’t It Be Nice he’d already finished the melody. He’d be banging away at the piano on this fun, bouncy song and so I started to write lyrics to it and he had nothing to do because his part was finished. So I got my yellow legal pad and I’m writing lyrics. Whatever I wrote he’s paying close attention because he’s got nothing else going on. There are so many notes in Wouldn’t It Be Nice that I thought I was gonna be there until hell freezes over. (laughs)"
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The best advice is NEVER marry someone you love. Marry someone who loves you.
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Truly the best advice I’ve ever heard. Well said.
I had a close call myself.
When she was in college she was sweet and wonderful.
She broke up with me and I was crushed—heartbroken.
Today (many years later) she is a (somewhat prominent) outspoken feminazi—totally crazy.
I had no clue.
(P.S. My one and only wife of twenty years is great—I really dodged the bullet.)
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