It’s simple when you aren’t thinking about sex but just listening to them and admiring their awesomeness respectfully.
Had a buddy who called this the "no pressure" scenario. You have no desire to ask the girl out so you're under "no pressure" to impress her. So you just act yourself.
If you were trying to impress her all of a sudden you couldn't string together three words!
I’ve got a friend, who I met when we were both leaders in the Jr High ministry at our church.
I had been a leader in that ministry for a few years, so I was a veteran. It was my home, my place of comfort. It was a LARGE youth ministry, made up of about 6 teams. Each team could have 6-12 leaders. Male and female. So every woman on that team was like a sister...sort of. In the most benign and boring sort of way.
When my friend Heidi came on board, we had never met.
She was just another woman leader on my team.
Was she attractive?
Yes ... but I never paid much attention to that.
She was a blond gal, who had been a cheerleader at Southern Miss...
And at times, acted like a blond...
A blond with the enthusiasm of a cheerleader.
I tease virtually EVERYBODY.
Heidi was a target rich environment.
So this was MY “no pressure” scenario.
It didn’t take long for us to build a brotherly sisterly relationship of teasing each other back and forth.
I knew it was good, when Heidi would say something (blondish)
and all the leaders would look at me, expecting a shot.
It got to a point that nothing needed to be said, just a facial expression.
I was also the brother that listened to her when a couple of her relationships ended.
I also listened to her ... ALOT...
When a new guy named Craig came around.
Craig is a carpenter, I’m a pipefitter, so as tradesmen we had a certain affinity.
He learned early that I wasn’t a threat and we got along great.
When Craig and Heidi got married, Craig asked me to be an usher.
A couple of years after Craig and Heidi got married, they had a party/ cook out at their house.
I knew Heidi’s 3 sisters and their husbands.
I knew Heidi’s parents.
I knew Craig’s parents.
Craig’s much younger little brother was specifically in my small group in the Jr High ministry.
But at this party, all these family members were around us, all at the same time, for at least a few hours.
Heidi and I were going back and forth like we always do, and her now father in law says: “Holy Cow, you guys are like brother and sister.”
To which Heidi responded IMMEDIATELY: “Yeah, he’s like the brother I never wanted.”
Heidi and I, as well as everybody else had a good laugh over that.
It was also at that time that we realized that it was one thing to say we were like brother and sister, but when family saw it, we no longer needed to even say it.
Indeed you get it
It could be a struggle when young unless the girl showed strong interest which is really what made things always happen
Not my charm or good looks