Windows spotted flashing its unmentionables in a Chicago clothier (BSODs Behaving Badly)

The Register ^ | Apr 3, 2020 | Richard Speed

[dayglored]

A bit of Friday humor at Microsoft's expense.

[dayglored]

Public BSOD ... PING!

You can find all the Windows Ping list threads with FR search: just search on keyword "windowspinglist".

[Raymann]

“jumped-up quiche masquerading as pizza” Thems fightin words.

[edwinland]

Maybe someone who knows what this is could provide a one-sentence summary. I’m curious

[Mr. K]

A windows haiku:

The blue screen of death
Microsoft has crashed again
No one hears your screams

[Larry Lucido]

Summary:

“I can’t write so here are 800 incohesive words.”

[miliantnutcase]

My digital signs have done that a few times. One even was a road sign heading onto the property. That’s why I keep lots of spares handy.

[IronJack]

Exactly. Chicago deep dish pizza is the evolution of that flatbread thin-crust abomination into an art form.

[Leaning Right]

I do enjoy a good haiku. If you don’t mind too much, I changed your last line.

The blue screen of death
Microsoft has crashed again
Bill Gates doesn’t care

[Larry Lucido]

"Unfortunately, I am also disgusted. This is incoherent dribble! This is a total redo and I'm assuming I need it right away."

[IronJack]

I think this is some ultra-hip way of saying you're supposed to look for examples of public displays of the "Blue Screen of Death" (BSOD) that make the owners of the display look like idiots (I assume that's what the "bork" reference is). It's getting to a point where language is being used to obfuscate more than to illuminate. Even on FR I can't keep up with the ridiculous "initials" that are supposed to represent whole thoughts.

LOL. TEOTWAWKI. ESAD. SHTF. BLOAT. And the list goes on. The latest one to pierce the netosphere is GOAT -- Greatest Of All Time.

GMAB. Give Me A Break.

[rarestia]

$100 says they’re running Windows 7 or earlier.

[texas booster]

The Register is a Brit electonic rag that takes great pride in the old English art form of headlines, and skewering management. Especially IT management that Knows All.

Here is a typical headline and foreword from today's pages:

Tech tracker Tile testifies in Congress: Apple's geolocation nagging is so not fair
Alleges anticompetitive behaviour in the walled garden. There's no party like a third party, eh?

[dayglored]

> $100 says they’re running Windows 7 or earlier.

That's an easy win. I'd guess 7 in general, but I've also seen public BSODs of Vista and XP.

[rarestia]

IRQ is an interrupt request. This is either a driver issue or, less likely, failed hardware.

I’d bet a week’s salary that it’s a Windows 7 machine, or if it’s not, it’s Windows 10 on very old hardware. This is more common than seen. Large format video display hardware is VERY expensive, and many organizations just don’t want to upgrade. This leaves them either sitting on dead or dying platforms or using all sorts of adapters to make connections, relying on poorly-supported third party drivers or programs.

[oil_dude]

The most annoying writing style I have ever seen...

[leaning conservative]

I thought it was me.

[Hot Tabasco]

GMAB. Give Me A Break.

Huh, in this age of acronym speaking, I thought that stood for Give Me A Beer

[Callan]

I bet an AI agent could write a more coherent story than 'ol Dick Speed here.

The article was nearly unreadable.

[dayglored]

It's Friday, and Dick Speed is doubtless working from home.

He was probably drunk when he wrote it. :-)