I still laugh when I think of Justin’s tooth ache and he couldn’t eat molasses any more. Missing molasses terribly, he finally saved enough money to get it pulled, he asked the dentist for the pulled tooth, took it home with him, poured a saucer full of molasses, dropped the tooth in it and said:
There, damn you, now hurt all you want to!
One of my favorite Justin Wilson stories is the young woman on the train with her baby. An old drunk Cajun is stumbling down the aisle, colliding with each row of seats as he ambles along. He stops by the woman and looks at the baby, “Lady, that’s the ugliest baby I’s ever seen before again in my life.”
The baby starts crying and then the woman too, wailing away, making a big commotion. The conductor comes to try and comfort her, “Lady, calm yourself down, take yourself easy. I’ll get you a glass of water....and I’ll get your monkey a banana.”