Posted on 04/07/2023 5:08:39 PM PDT by SamAdams76
Most gas stations these days have a convenience store attached to them, where you can get a dirty hot dog that has been spinning on steel rollers in a heated compartment for who knows how many days. You can pull that hot dog off the steel rollers with tongs that have not been cleaned since the day the store opened. Underneath are drawers that contain slightly stale rolls that do occasionally get changed out by the 19-year-old clerk who is usually reading a magazine on the counter during slow periods. Which occur often in the dark hours of the night.
If you buy a magazine in a gas station convenience store, you can be pretty sure it was read on the counter by one of the clerks. They are at least careful to not smear or otherwise damage the magazine so that it can be placed back in the magazine rack in somewhat pristine and salable condition.
Down South, they used to call gas stations "filling stations" and in some rural areas, they probably still do. I think "filling station" is a way more descriptive term than gas station.
Filling station conjures up images of Billy Carter types sitting out front on a bench in coveralls, sipping on some sweet tea, waiting for a customer to come along. Filling stations also brings this C.W. McCall video to mind. You can almost picture the Rand McNally maps inside that all us motorists used in the pre GPS days. The ones that folded out but could never get folded back properly again unless you had a patient wife in the passenger seat to do that for you. The kind of wife who organizes her threads and needles back at home and has replacement buttons for any item of clothing that might need one. Guaranteed an organized wife like that can be counted upon to properly fold up your maps for you and store them neatly in the glove compartment.
Glove compartment! Who actually stores gloves in the glove compartment of a car? Usually that is where the still shrink-wrapped owners manual of the car is stored along with your registration (comes in handy when you are pulled over for speeding), a half eaten package of cheese and crackers, and a bunch of loose change you will never see again. But I digress.
Now we all know that these filling stations with convenience stores have plenty of parking spaces out front and even on the sides, and sometimes even in the back. This is so that people who already got their gas can then slide into one of those spaces to go inside, allowing any drivers in back of them to roll up to the pumps to get their gas.
But as all of us know to well, this sequence of events does not always happen. What happens more often then is should is that a driver who has already gotten their gas will then commit the unpardonable sin of leaving the car right at the pump as they go inside the convenience store to get one of those dirty hot dogs. Or browse those magazines. Or even worse, go into the restroom. Meanwhile, the driver waiting to use the pump you left your car sitting in front of is sitting there, steaming mad.
Doesn't that drive everybody crazy? Don't be that guy!
Now another thing about gas pumps these days is that they still labor under the delusion that cell phones, which pretty much everybody in America now carries, are dangerous to have around gas pumps for some odd reason. Now if that were true, we would be having hundreds if not thousands of filling stations blowing up every day all across America. That's because almost everybody pumps their gas while either chatting on those phones or checking their social media or emails, etc.
Now check out the photo of the gas pump over to the left. See the big white WARNING sign to keep your cellphone turned off within 25 feet of the pump. Then look over to the right and see that their is an option to pay for your gas by using your cellphone!
It is illogical things like this that drive me crazy. You have an option to pay at the pump with your cellphone yet have a warning to keep the same cellphone turned off within 25 feet of the pump!
Now pumping your own gas in these filling stations is also a fairly new thing. If you are above the age of maybe 50 or so, you will remember the days where it was unthinkable you would pump your own gas in a filling station.
As recently as the 1970s, you would pull into a filling station and some friendly guy in a white uniform would come running out to not only pump your gas but check your oil, fill up your washing fluid, and wash your windshield as well. Even if they did get shot at from time to time.
Well that era of happy filling station clerks is long gone (except in New Jersey) and you are now expected to pump your own gas and check your own oil. Most filling stations have some kind of apparatus to clean your windshield but because the squeegees are so filthy, doing so is likely to make your windshield even dirtier than it was before.
Now when a woman is in a car with at least one man, protocol dictates that it is the man that gets out of the car to actually pump the gas. Doesn't even matter if the woman is driving the car. It is the man who must get out to pump the gas at all times. You never want to be the man to sit in a car while the woman gets out to pump the gas!
When women are driving alone however, they have no choice but to get out and pump the gas themselves but they are usually uncomfortable doing it. It just doesn't come natural to them. Women pumping gas always have that perplexed look, as if they are unsure about whether or not they are doing it right. Often they put the car on the opposite side of where the gas cap is, forcing them to get back into the car to pull around the other side of the pump. It's very awkward to watch but sometimes funny too.
However, the biggest "woman mistake" on pumping gas is leaving the fuel nozzle still in the car and driving away. This would appear to have serious consequences but fortunately most filling stations are equipped with "break away" devices at the pumps, which allows the nozzle and hose to travel with the car and the gas at the pump is automatically switched off so there is no leakage.
When the woman finally gets home and notices, the husband or boyfriend is supposed to then return the hose and nozzle back to the filling station and apologize to the owner or manager of the filling station and all is good.
It is considered bad form for the man to have his woman deal with this herself.
Well this is my post about filling stations, inspired by the sultry song linked below by one-time belly dancer Maria Muldaur, who is still alive and kicking at the age of 80. Why does this song remind me of filling stations? Probably because filling stations can certainly be a welcome oasis when you are doing an all-night drive across the country. Those dirty hot dogs on steel rollers can really hit the spot on an all-night drive, especially when you can get two hot dogs for the bargain price of $2.22 each ($4.44 total), washed down with some black coffee that was probably brewed that morning.
Still don't know what is meant by the lyric "Send Your Camel To Bed" however. Sounds kinky.
Maria Muldaur - Midnight At The Oasis (1974)
https://sharpens.org/lyrics/meaning/midnight-at-the-oasis-by-maria-muldaur
Verse 1 – What does it mean?
“Midnight at the oasis
Send your camel to bed
Shadows painting our faces
Traces of romance in our heads
Heaven’s holding a half moon
Shining just for us
Let’s slip off to
A sand dune, real soon
And kick up a little dust”
The first verse begins with painting the background setting for the listener. Maria makes it clear with the words she chooses that the song is closely related to the desert. The mention of the oasis, a place in desert where water is found, is a testament to that fact. Maria asks her lover to send his camel to bed. That line implies that they’ve been travelling in the desert with each other. Usually, camels are used as a method of transportation in deserts as they can survive for extended periods of time without water and cover longer distances at one go. As the song progresses, it becomes clear that the singer is in a romantic mood. The depth of her perception is astounding as it seems that time has stood still for her. She’s gazing at the shadows that are painting her lover’s face. The romance seems to be building up as they’re both caught in the moment. Evenings in deserts are especially aesthetic as the temperature begins to drop and the sunset creates a wholly romantic vibe. The half-moon shining on the sand seems to make the narrator lust for her lover. She suggests that they find a sand dune and get intimate with each other. By “kicking up a little dust”, she means engaging in sex.
All the convenience stores around here toss out all the hot dogs.donuts and coffee around midnight.
Geez dude, are you trying to get a job writing for NPR?
Just kidding.
I travel a lot for work, often pulling a trailer. Most stations don’t really have somewhere to pull over and park after a fillup. If the station is busy I’m more apt to try. If they’re not busy I fill up then walk in.
Gee. I would have never guessed! LMAO
I was 11 or 12 when this song was popular but remember it well. Even at that age the sultriness of it came through loud and clear so I knew it had to do with something a little naughty, something my parents did when they had their bedroom door closed tight and locked. For one time I walked in on them when they were in the act. I thought my mother was dying in there which is why I ran in. From that point on, they kept their door locked and even to this day, I never spoke of it to them. (I eventually figured out what was really going on).
Innocent times!
The clerks aren’t reading magazines. Not for the last 10 years or so. They’re on their phones. AKA, their “devices.”
filling station dogs are the best!
Bucc-ee’s solves that problem by having six million pumps
Well, the nearest Buc-eea to me is 600 miles away, so there’s that.
That said, I’ve got a fresh bag of Beaver Nuggets in the snack pantry and just cooked burgers on the grill I bought at Buc-ees.
The schedule after midnight is as follows. Make fresh coffee. Check and toss non-packaged food, clean up food area, refill anything that is under 50% except for coffee creamer and sugar. Always refill those.
Clean bath room (s). Make fresh coffee. Do inventory. Restock shelves. (it is about three AM for those of you keeping track) Check and clean soda dispenser. Clean coffee maker. Put out non-packaged food items. Put danishes in oven. Empty cleaner out of coffee maker. Rinse twice. Make fresh coffee. Refill cream and sugar station. You are now ready for the rush starting at about four thirty.
You will start with the newspaper arriving. Snap the band and put them out. Make it snappy because you are about to get flooded. Did you put the danishes out? Don't worry, the oven has a auto shut off but move it buddy! Danishes in their places go go go!
Ring up those sales, grab cigarettes, lotto tickets and slide them across the counter.(You did remember to check ID right? Good boy!) Keep an eye on your cash drawer. No more then $150 in the drawer. Any $100 bills go in the drop safe immediately. Keep an eye on the pumps. People will drive off without paying. They are jerks like that. If there is any lull make fresh coffee. Refill cream and sugar station. Wipe up the spills. You do not want anyone to slip. Back to the register. Double time it, you have a line forming!
I’ve always loved this song, have it on my YouTube playlist.
Send your camel to bed BECAUSE you’re not going to ride away from this oasis, I have plans for you tonight, big boy. Any woman would understand that.
Veto!
(Female)
Buc-ees brisket! Best ever!
You can't pump your own gas in Oregon either, with some exceptions. A bill to allow self-service gas in the entire state has recently passed the Oregon House.
Back in my college days in Columbia, Missouri (’69-’73), there was a downtown station named “U-Pump Ethyl.” Best gas station name ever!
One of those songs that I hear and immediately think “The drummer went nuts and killed his mom.”
Not seeing that. On the right, there’s a “Tap to pay” via credit card symbol, but nothing about using a phone. Am I missing something?
This author sure is uppity. Too haughty for me to read further. And he is wrong.
Pride. Pharisee!
That author is definitely uppity - whoever the heck he is!
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