I am singleing out W because is so close geographicaly, and since I basically did camp out with my Mom before she was called home.
I held her hand when she passed and I am glad I was there with her then, so maybe this is why I am so curious about it.
I’m glad you were with your mom when she passed, but we don’t have any way of knowing the reasons W wasn’t there. Maybe the last time he saw him, he looked stronger. The point is, we don’t know. Why speculate negatively?
It is hard to say. In my case, we knew my Dad could go at any time, in an hour, a day, a week, or more. We needed to help out my Mom with some important support, and I needed to get to Dad’s old bank. (Mom & Dad were divorced & at the time of his death. We had moved Dad to a facility close to us, B4 he was (repeatedly) hospitalized, but Mom was 1-1/2 hrs. away, and housebound.) I’d talked to the nurse, who said Dad seemed fairly stable and we should go ahead and see Mom briefly. We did, and sure enough, we got the call that Dad was suddenly in trouble, and we’d better get there. We did - about 30 minutes too late. :-(
I suspect my Dad did not go entirely peacefully - maybe it was all for the better. I was with him when pneumonia nearly took him several months earlier - a horrible struggle to witness - one of the worst nights of both our lives.
Meaning absolutely nothing. A close friend had her father living in her house at the end. She was with him until minutes before he passed. Somehow, he was bound and determined for her not to be in the room with him when he went. According to his caregiver, as soon as his daughter left the room, he passed.