Posted on 01/21/2004 9:33:48 PM PST by Nachum
FORT CAMPBELL, Ky. - There were hugs, kisses and shouts of joy as families greeted 101st Airborne Division soldiers freshly home from Iraq. Then there was a dose of reality.
Army spouses holding newborn babies and "Welcome Home" banners suddenly got quiet and listened as a chaplain and physician delivered the sobering message: Not everything will be easy in upcoming days.
"We just ask that you take it slow, that you communicate with each other. Talk about expectations. There may be things you need to talk about," Chaplain Kerry Greene told them.
Anger, resentment and flashbacks are just some of the problems that can arise as the soldiers have time to assess what they saw in Iraq and readjust to the responsibilities of home life.
Some soldiers may resent that things ran smoothly without them, or question why tasks such as paying bills or disciplining children have been done a certain way.
Lt. Col. Melinda Cavicchia, an Army physician who helps give the briefings, tells the families to seek help before the situation gets out of control.
"If your soldiers are having problems, there's a place to go," Cavicchia said. "And if you are having problems, you also have a place to go."
The briefings are part of a series of steps the Army is taking in hopes of preventing domestic violence, drunken driving and even suicide. They were mandated after four wives at Fort Bragg, N.C., were allegedly killed in 2002 at the hands of their soldier husbands. In three of the killings, the men involved had recently returned from duty in Afghanistan.
The soldiers from the 101st - about 20,000 - are beginning to return to Fort Campbell after a year in Kuwait and Iraq. It is expected to take until April for the entire division to return.
The 101st fought in major combat on the drive to Baghdad, and then settled in northern Iraq to help rebuild the country. Sixty soldiers from Fort Campbell have died in the Iraq war.
Greene said research shows that there are fewer problems when people are aware of things that can happen.
The messages to 101st Airborne Division families range from telling soldiers to follow traffic rules - sometimes a challenge for those used to plowing over curbs in Humvees - to being prepared for soldiers' irritability from jet lag.
The talks are also meant to ease fears families might have about diseases the soldiers could come home with, such as Leishmaniasis - a skin disease transmitted by bites from sand flies that causes lesions known as the "Baghdad boil."
Brochures are available at the homecomings with information about possible issues for reuniting soldiers and their families.
Cavicchia reminds the families that the soldiers were not allowed to consume alcohol during the year they were deployed, and their tolerance could be lower than before they left.
"You need to look after them and make sure they remain safe so they don't overdo it ... of course, they shouldn't drink or operate any other machinery after they do drink," Cavicchia said.
Cavicchia said some of the spouses have thanked her after the briefings.
To some, the information can seem intrusive, but it's a good idea, said Kristine Underhill, a 34-year-old mother of three who listened with her newborn baby girl in a carrier by her side.
She's ecstatic her husband, Sgt. 1st Class Randal Underhill, is home, but she said she knows from his previous deployments it takes time to readjust.
"A lot of people need it. A year's a long time to be gone. ... I didn't want to hear it, but it needs to be said."
Very true- but often (at least during vietnam) soldiers came home alone, and didn't get a chance to decompress. I saw another post regarding another unit that mentioned the troops were going to have to go through two days of half-day schedules before they took leave.
I'm usually not a fan of psycho-babble, but in this case I think it's a good idea to prep the family, prep the troops...and try to make the transition as easy as possible.
I would hate to read about a 20 year old kid getting killed driving drunk the first night he's back.
let's hope they all have soft landing.
I think it was easier when we transferred at the time of the homecoming - instead of his coming in and "taking over" my routine, we started up a whole new routine together.
I guess so...but then again during the world war II Demob it took months to get the troops back home, and they generally came back as a unit.
I don't buy into the whole "veterans are walking time bombs/incipient nutjobs/scarred beyond hope thing- I suspect many of the homeless who claim to be suffering Vietnam vets are posers. (see "Stolen Valor")
But still, I imagine it's a pretty big adjustment-one that may be harder for some than for other. Different vets may have had different experiences, depending on their jobs.
A 19 year old infantry guy may have gone through things that were more trying than what a clerk or a dentist experienced.
Sounds like it must have been one of the best times of his life. :)
Don't claim to be hero like one of those young folks and loved supporting and treating them, that was the highlight of my career. I got a little fed up with the force fed mandatory briefings on how you have been screwed up and how hard it is going to be on you when you get back home sort of garbage. It sort of smacked of the kinder gentler soldier stuff which I think is absurd given the mission.
He enjoys treating the troops as well (63B9B in Army terminology - comprehensive dentist). He just volunteered for a "short" tour in Kuwait - 90-120 days but no guarantees. He is due to retire in a year and a half so I suspect he'll be home by then.
Just because couples didn't get counselling or help decades ago doesn't mean they were living a fairy tale life. Often the wife stayed with her husband because there really weren't choices and there was almost a stigma attached to divorce. That doesn't mean that the marriage was either happy nor solid.
Couples who face reality and accept that there will be changes in their relationship are far better able to deal with issues before they become problems.
I don't understand why this concept should bother some people. If someone doesn't gain anything by getting some advice from others, that's great. But if others benefit from such advice, that's great, also. It's a very personal matter and each couple needs to handle it the way that is best for them.
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