Al, We Hardly Know Ye (Barf/Eric Alterman Alert!) (Algore Hypnotizes Chickens)

The Nation ^ | 2.12.2004 | Eric Alterman

[Dolphy]

"How could our precious nation have become so uncharacteristically vulnerable to such an effective use of fear to manipulate our politics?"

He should try looking at the 8 years he spent manipulating our politics so that we didn't see that the Clinton response to terrorism was ineffective, ill conceived and out of proportion to the risk. Perhaps a more communicative and serious administration would have not have left the nation so painfully vulnerable.

[jackbill]

Hell, I can hypnotize lobsters.

[NYC GOP Chick]

*LOL*

[NYC GOP Chick]

For some odd reason, all I can think of here is Rocky Balboa chasing the chicken.

Or Alphagore's former boss choking his chicken...into the Oval Office sink! Ewww!

[Dan from Michigan]

Or Alphagore's former boss choking his chicken...into the Oval Office sink! Ewww!

Damn! And I just ate too. Thanks a whole helluva lot for that visual.

[Ole Okie]

I asked him and later demonstrating the technique he developed during his teenage years for hypnotizing chickens

I've never even heard of that, and I know a few farmers.

Yeah, chickens can be hypnotized. Takes about 5 minutes to learn how.

Very few farmers spend time hypnotizing chickens, because after they're in a trance, they still no speaka da English.

Therefore, regressing them back to an egg isn't too feasible, and post-hypnotic suggestions to lay a whole bunch of eggs a day are lost on them.

[NYC GOP Chick]

Sorry. :(

[Dan from Michigan]

Sorry. :( Don't be. I forgot to put the lol before "Damn". That IS a bad visual though.

[Vision Thing]

I'm glad the dem pundits such as Alterman enjoy showing off their intellectual abilities. It loses so many of the people they need to reach. If he keeps this up, the dem minions and the independents will scratch their heads and ask: What the heck is this guy talking about?

Alterman and the elitist dem leadership are no great communicators. As a result, they will lose because they will never influence the majority of voters.

[Dixie Mom]

Rebecca Ransohoff, 9, watches Vice President Al Gore explain how to hypnotize chickens.
(Michael E. Keating photo)
Friday, March 24, 2000

Gore does chicken dance

---

VP evades but can't elude student's question

BY HOWARD WILKINSON
The Cincinnati Enquirer

School, of course, is for learning things. Like how to hypnotize a chicken.

        The usual subject of language arts in Sharon McCreary's fourth, fifth and sixth grade class at Sands Montessori School took a back seat briefly Thursday to a somewhat reluctant lecture from the vice president of the United States on how to make a chicken sleepy, veeerry sleepy.

        Al Gore stopped in Ms. McCreary's classroom as part of a quick tour of the school's crumbling physical structure.

        After looking at the peeling paint on the windows, Mr. Gore chatted with students.

        Just as Mr. Gore was about to leave, 11-year-old Hessam Akhlaghpour of Clifton piped up to tell the vice president he had heard him talking on CBS' 60 Minutes about how people in his native Tennessee would hypnotize chickens for amusement.

        “Tell us how to do it,” Hessam said. Mr. Gore laughed and started backing toward the door.

        “No, really, tell us how to do it,” Hessam insisted, like a mini-Mike Wallace.

        So the vice president, after warning the kids “not to try this at home,” told them: Hold a chicken's head on the ground. Take a finger or a stick and draw circles around the chicken's head.

        “He'll try to follow the stick and, in no time, he'll go "cluck, cluck' and he's out,” Mr. Gore said.

        Hessam said he was satisfied with the explanation.

        “I was just curious,” he said.

[NYC GOP Chick]

So the vice president, after warning the kids “not to try this at home,” told them: Hold a chicken's head on the ground. Take a finger or a stick and draw circles around the chicken's head.

“He'll try to follow the stick and, in no time, he'll go "cluck, cluck' and he's out,” Mr. Gore said.

Essentially, Algore just gave away the secret for duping the easily led into voting for the 'rats.

[Dixie Mom]

LOL--the Algore chicken whammy.

[Freedom4US]

The only thing more disturbing than an article full of so many logical fallacies and pompous, arrogant gobbledy-gook is the authoress apparently really believes it.

I have to hand it to leftists on one thing, though - they show an astonishing organizational competence with respect to talking points - the same old lies, sometimes recycled but cleverly hidden, always ridiculous but repeated early and often, often enough that people start to believe them. But see above.

[nicollo]

...there's been a dramatic change in the nature of what the philosopher Jürgen Habermas has described as the structure of the public forum--the way our political discourse takes place.

Wow, I guess masturbation really ain't all it's cracked up to be... He really didn't need to explain it.

[Badray]

"I suppose that explains how Alphagore got the 'rat nomination in '00..."

ROFLMAO

I think that algore did more than his share of chicken chokin' too. Maybe after he hypnotised *it*.

[NYC GOP Chick]

I think that algore did more than his share of chicken chokin' too. Maybe after he hypnotised *it*.

I think you're confusing him with his former master! Although I bet Algore fancies himself something of a master debator...

[Badray]

No, I think that algore's best chance of getting any is with himself. clinton was just an addict who used everything and everyone as a recepticle. Same act, just different motivations.

[NYC GOP Chick]

I have but three words for you, my friend: Oval Office Sink

[Badray]

"I have but three words for you, my friend: Oval Office Sink."

Oval office sink = Monica = recepticle. Ain't love grand?

[Ann Archy]

I think I can hypnotize my husband cause when I talk his eyes glaze over! :)