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Man Tries to Crucify Himself: Calls 911 when he can't nail second hand to cross
Bangor Daily News ^
| 3/16/04
Posted on 03/16/2004 11:11:44 AM PST by silverleaf
Man treated after attempting to nail himself to cross
HARTLAND A Hartland man was treated at a Pittsfield hospital after he nailed himself to a cross. The 23-year-old man apparently was trying to commit suicide Thursday evening in his living room, the Bangor Daily News reported.
Somerset County Sheriff Barry DeLong said Monday that no charges will be filed. "There is no crime here," he said. Police said the man appeared delusional and told them he had been "seeing pictures of God on the computer." He told them he had not seen the hit movie "The Passion of the Christ," which depicts the Crucifixion of Jesus.
"When he realized that he was unable to nail his other hand to the board, he called 911," Boucher said.
It was unclear whether the man was seeking assistance for his injury or help in nailing down his other hand.....
(Excerpt) Read more at pressherald.com ...
TOPICS: Culture/Society; News/Current Events; US: Maine
KEYWORDS: dontdothis; doofus; messiahsimplex; passion
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To: silverleaf
Where are the Roman Legions when you really need them?
2
posted on
03/16/2004 11:13:05 AM PST
by
silverleaf
(Fasten your seat belts- it's going to be a BUMPY ride.)
To: silverleaf
What cell phone service would jesus use?
3
posted on
03/16/2004 11:14:34 AM PST
by
js1138
To: silverleaf
What's the sound of one hand nailing?
4
posted on
03/16/2004 11:14:47 AM PST
by
Damocles
(sword of...)
To: silverleaf
"When he realized that he was unable to nail his other hand to the board, he called 911," Boucher said.Perhaps he should have nailed that hand first? ; )
5
posted on
03/16/2004 11:14:51 AM PST
by
EGPWS
Comment #6 Removed by Moderator
To: biblewonk
And you thought suicide by chainsaw was difficult...
7
posted on
03/16/2004 11:15:19 AM PST
by
newgeezer
(Just my opinion, of course. Your mileage may vary. You have the right to be wrong.)
To: silverleaf
He should have called Kevorkian Hardware Supplies.
8
posted on
03/16/2004 11:15:24 AM PST
by
DrewsDad
To: silverleaf
Ya see, here? This is what they call a reflection of poor planning...
9
posted on
03/16/2004 11:15:24 AM PST
by
Ronin
(When the fox gnaws, smile!!)
To: silverleaf
The 23-year-old man apparently was trying to commit suicide make the evening news Thursday evening in his living room, the Bangor Daily News reported.
To: silverleaf
Where are the Roman Legions when you really need them?Or the Judean People's Front Crack Suicide Squad. Guess this guy couldn't make the cut.
11
posted on
03/16/2004 11:16:00 AM PST
by
dirtboy
(Howard, we hardly knew ye. Not that we're complaining, mind you...)
To: silverleaf
Even though he had not seen the Passion, people will try to tie these together.
Patriot Paradox
12
posted on
03/16/2004 11:16:47 AM PST
by
sonsofliberty2000
(If it wasn't for my horse I wouldn't have spent that year in college...)
To: Ronin
PLAN AHEA
D
13
posted on
03/16/2004 11:16:54 AM PST
by
So Cal Rocket
(If consistency is the hobgoblin of small minds, John F. Kerry’s mind must be freaking enormous)
To: EGPWS
It would be nice if you could take your arms off and hang them up while you sleep, so you wouldn't roll over on them - however, how would you hang the second one up?
14
posted on
03/16/2004 11:17:04 AM PST
by
MrB
To: mhking
ping
To: dirtboy
What of the Popular Front of Judea
16
posted on
03/16/2004 11:19:26 AM PST
by
Bogey78O
(European men have to pee sitting down until they vote out the socialists)
To: silverleaf
From The Young Ones "Demolition" episode:
Rick, in self-appointed martyr mode, is trying to mount himself on a giant cross affixed to the front of the house and Neil (hippy) yells up, "Rick, that's a really horrible way to kill yourself, man...I've tried, there's no way you can hammer in the last nail."
17
posted on
03/16/2004 11:20:02 AM PST
by
Feiny
(Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing.)
To: MrB
It would be nice if you could take your arms off and hang them up while you sleep, so you wouldn't roll over on them - however, how would you hang the second one up?NOW come on!!! You know better than that!
HANG THE SECOND ONE UP FIRST!!! Silly. SHHHESH!
18
posted on
03/16/2004 11:20:43 AM PST
by
EGPWS
To: silverleaf
Why is this article excerpted?? Do we have a problem with a little-known rag in Maine?
==================================
Man treated after attempting to nail himself to cross
HARTLAND A Hartland man was treated at a Pittsfield hospital after he nailed himself to a cross. The 23-year-old man apparently was trying to commit suicide Thursday evening in his living room, the Bangor Daily News reported.
Somerset County Sheriff Barry DeLong said Monday that no charges will be filed. "There is no crime here," he said.
Police said the man appeared delusional and told them he had been "seeing pictures of God on the computer." He told them he had not seen the hit movie "The Passion of the Christ," which depicts the Crucifixion of Jesus.
Lt. Pierre Boucher said the man took two pieces of wood, nailed them together in the form of a cross and placed them on the floor. He attached a suicide sign to the wood and then proceeded to nail one of his hands to the makeshift cross using a 14-penny nail and a hammer.
"When he realized that he was unable to nail his other hand to the board, he called 911," Boucher said.
It was unclear whether the man was seeking assistance for his injury or help in nailing down his other hand.
Hartland Fire Department members responded, said Boucher, and cut off the wood while it was still attached to the man's hand. The wood and the victim were taken to Sebasticook Valley Hospital, where the nail was removed.
Boucher said he did not know whether the man received further treatment.
19
posted on
03/16/2004 11:21:26 AM PST
by
boris
(The deadliest Weapon of Mass Destruction in History is a Leftist With a Word Processor)
To: silverleaf
This reminds me of my favorite silly story book from childhood. The cat and dog got muddy, then washed up. The cat hung the dog on the clothesline to dry, then the dog jumped down and hung up the cat, so there they both hung.... It was just silly. Even as a child I saw that it would never work.
20
posted on
03/16/2004 11:21:31 AM PST
by
Geritol
(Lord willing, there will be a later...)
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