"When the first plane hit, my reaction was the pilots could not get the plane out of auto -pilot and were struggling to get manual control of the plane, and as bad luck would have it they hit a tall building."
The first hit must have been very improbable.
When I heard about the first hit, I made a joke about it, which will bother me for a long, long time.
Don't beat yourself up over it, my friend. I think we all had similar reactions over it initially.