Your reading of the Ninth Amendment is just simply wrong.
Saying that those things that are not mentioned cannot be presumed to be prohibited, is a far cry from saying that everything that isn't enumerated as a right is also a right.
If it said what you'd like it to say, only Treason would be a crime.
"If it said what you'd like it to say, only Treason would be a crime."
Not quite. Treason, piracy and counterfeiting are the only crimes where the FEDERAL GOVERNMENT has jurisdiction (outside federal military enclaves, where Congress does have authority to regulate the conduct of the armed services, as it does using the Uniform Code of Military Justice). All other crime is then dealt with by the States and the local authorities.