"As a worthless, pathetic excuse for a human being, I want to make it clear to anyone in uniform and to their loved ones that I'm not qualified to lead flies to a steaming pile of dog sh!t. My poorly stated joke at a rally should only be considered further evidence of my complete lack of tact, wit and any sense of patriotic fervor for the United States of America.
I sincerely regret that my words were heard by Americans and would have much preferred that they'd have been restricted to their intended audience in the Republic of Viet Nam where my true sympathies lie.
It is clear the Republican Party would rather talk about my ineptitude and treasonous words directed at the men and women in uniform. I will continue to thrash about like a gill snagged trout while the perverts and communists in Massachussetts continue to elect me to office where I will continue my efforts to undermine the work of our founding fathers and smear the members of our uniformed services. I will continue to laugh my ass off all the way to Theresa's bank, knowing that 200 years ago I would be tarred and feathered for my insidious, seditious language, and yet in this day and age I will barely be called to account."
Kerry's "apology" is INSULTING!