Charlton Heston is deeply saddened.
Posted on 01/17/2007 8:25:52 AM PST by anymouse
SHREVEPORT, La. - In a mysterious bit of monkey business, a female at a chimpanzee sanctuary has given birth, despite the fact that the facility's entire male chimp population has had vasectomies.
Now managers at Chimp Haven are planning a paternity test for the seven males who lived in a group with Teresa, a wild-born chimpanzee in her late 40s who had the baby girl last week.
Workers have started collecting hair samples from the chimps for testing. Once they identify the father, it's back to the operating room for him.
Chimp Haven managers said they knew something was up when Teresa was missing during morning rounds on January 8. Later in the day, she appeared with a newborn chimpanzee in her arms.
"Well, we were all just a little bit surprised when we heard the news," said Linda Brent, a spokeswoman for Chimp Haven.
The baby chimpanzee was named Tracy and she and her mother are doing fine, Brent said.
Teresa had 10 other offspring before retiring to Chimp Haven over a year ago. This is her first baby in 13 years.
It's also the first chimpanzee born at the sanctuary although officials there hope there will be no more accidents.
Chimp Haven provides long-term care for chimpanzees who are no longer needed for laboratory research. It was established by a group of primatologists and is located on 200 forested acres about 20 miles southwest of Shreveport. The first chimpanzee residents began arriving in 2005, according to the sanctuary's Web site.
Charlton Heston is deeply saddened.
Where IS Joey Buttafucco these days?
ROFL! I was trying to think of a clever remark along those lines.
:)
Chimp Haven managers said they knew something was up..............OOOOKAY!
LOL! I knew a guy who pastored a church in California who had a vasectomy and his wife got pregnant several years later. There was some fast talking going on! They are not 100% guaranteed.
Has Billy Clinton been the area?
Musta been a real two-bagger.
Any Arabs in the area?
I saw a Discovery Channel special on this sanctuary a few weeks ago. There are a LOT of NASA chimps still alive from the days of Ham, the first chimp in space. NASA leased them out to pharmaceutical companies for years when they had no further use for them. Many are HIV positive from AIDS research, though they don't have AIDS. It's very sad how they were treated. Several sanctuaries have opened up to care for them in their old age. It's sad what they have gone through.
vasectomies don't always work.
I was dating a girl years back and was at her house when her folks came home after discussing that her mom was prego again after her dad had his tubes cut. It was a tense evening...
He went back to the doctors and it was checked and he tubes grew back together and he was the father (again, tense couple of days in that marriage).
I love your tag line! Heinlein's "Starship Trooper" has been one of my favorite books since reading it in the early 70's. In fact, I give it (if I can find a copy) to every young person entering military service. The movie was an utter travesty.
Colonel, USAFR
Maybe it was a Yeti??
Nifong has proof that a member of the Duke lacrosse team is the father.
It's a sign from Jesus. Another virgin birth.
As sad as animal testing is, I'd rather they do it on animals than on humans.
A friend of mine was the Meta-Data manager at Pfizer in CT. He had access to all levels except one. Apparently there is a troop of sexually deranged monkeys down there. Wheeeeeeeeeeee!
It is a modern mystery. I'd check the zookeepers, who are the closet things to a butler, and in old mysteries, the butler always did it.
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