Posted on 03/12/2007 2:10:17 PM PDT by NYTexan
President Bush’s most recent trip to Latin America has brought with it the standard anti-U.S. protests. Most of these being nearly identical to the ones that are regularly held on weekdays in the United States where participants are not actually missing work, American flags are lit on fire, and rioters hold poorly spelled signs and scream in broken English.
By some estimates, the most recent protest in Bogata drew as many as 250-300 Third Worlders who took time out of their busy schedules of chewing coca leaves, kidnapping for ransom, and playing soccer with rolled up rags on dirt lawns, to attack Mr. Bush.
For the most part, the crowd was fairly reserved. Some burned the president in effigy. Others threw homemade explosives called “potato bombs”. While others merely fired randomly into the crowd with assault weapons. However, one protester crossed the line screaming “Bush is a faggot!”, and had to be forcibly removed by UN forces.
The President can expect a similar reaction when he visits Guatemala today where local priests have vowed to “purify” the sacred Mayan religious site that he will be visiting.
“Bush is a very, very bad man,” said Mayan religious leader Acat Cuxtal (pictured at right). “We will have to use powerful magic to rid our country of his foul stench. Many chickens and goats will die to cleanse our sacred religious site at Iximche after this devil leaves.”
Cuxtal went on to say that goats and chickens are not the typical sacrificial symbols, but circumstances have dictated that they be used.
“Traditionally we would sacrifice a virgin in such a serious situation,” Cuxtal told a TNOYF reporter. “However, that all changed after your last president was in town. By the time he left, the closest thing to a virgin we could find was a 45-year-old syphilitic with a chronic yeast infection.”
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Nice earmuffs!
Haven't the demon-rats already tried that?
Pinging the usual suspects! (and some unusual ones too!)
(anyone wanting on or off the satire ping list, let me know!)
>>>one protester crossed the line screaming “Bush is a faggot!”
John Edwards, is that you?
These native people must be very well off and well fed if they have "extra" chickens and goats around.
He was sent to rehab along with the 45-year-old syphilitic with a chronic yeast infection.
PETA won't like this.
Virgin sacrifice alert...
I bet John Skerry and Pelosi Galore are glad they did not travel with the President. Why with them killing additional chickens and (old) goats their lives would have been in jeopardy.
Real bleepin' civilized of you.
gross :P
LMAO!
No, PETA is Conflicted.
please tell me this is a spoof piece..
Please don't tell me that they are choking those defenseless chickens.
"Acat Cuxtal"
Acat - god of beautification (tattoos)
Cuxtal - god of childbirth
So translated means, "Beautiful Child"?
Huh?
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