Are Men Boring?

The Telegraph ^ | 11 June 2008 | Sabine Durrant

[Adder]

Lets see...the article about how boring women are is where?

The one guy extolled his son and the other talked sports....her contributions were so much more....like....ummmm....what DID she have to say again?

She, and the article assert men are boring...so it must be true when in truth it was the most boring and self serving drivel one could imagine.

Go fix me a sandwhich, woman!

[MaxMax]

Us men are supposed to spend all our money and now be the entertainment?

[wordsofearnest]

Sounds like my wife. I just want to know the time not how to build a watch. And “I don’t know” is an acceptable answer.

[444Flyer]

When I was in my twenties, I dated a rodeo riding/stunt man. He once gave me some great advice which I’ve never forgotten. He said, “Tell me the story but keep it to the “Reader’s Digest” version”. At the time I railed him for it, but as I’ve matured and learned a lot more about men. I have realized that you need to communicate differently to a man than to one of your girlfriends. Not boring, just different. That has helped me with every relationship I have with a male whether it be a friend, my dad or my husband.

THIS ONE’S FOR YOU GUYS!

**
U

Toby Keith

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cYrlzEUuBIM

[weegee]

The headline is wrong. It should read “Are British Men Boring?”

There’s no England now, maybe this is a part of the problem.

[kalee]

“I’m Still A Guy”

When you see a deer you see Bambi
And I see antlers up on the wall
When you see a lake you think picnic
And I see a large mouth up under that log
You’re probably thinking that you’re going to change me
In some ways well maybe you might
Scrub me down, dress me up but no matter what
I’m still a guy

When you see a priceless French painting
I see a drunk, naked girl
You think that riding a wild bull sounds crazy
And I’d like to give it a whirl
Well love makes a man do some things he ain’t proud of
And in a weak moment I might walk your sissy dog, hold your purse at the mall
But remember, I’m still a guy

I’ll pour out my heart
Hold your hand in the car
Write a love song that makes you cry
Then turn right around knock some jerk to the ground
‘Cause he copped a feel as you walked by

I can hear you now talking to your friends
Saying, “Yeah girls he’s come a long way”
From dragging his knuckles and carrying a club

And building a fire in a cave
But when you say a backrub means only a backrub
Then you swat my hand when I try
Well, what can I say at the end of the day
Honey, I’m still a guy

I’ll pour out my heart
Hold your hand in the car
Write a love song that makes you cry
Then turn right around knock some jerk to the ground
‘Cause he copped a feel as you walked by

These days there’s dudes getting facials
Manicured, waxed and botoxed
With deep spray-on tans and creamy lotiony hands
You can’t grip a tacklebox

With all of these men lining up to get neutered
It’s hip now to be feminized
I don’t highlight my hair
I’ve still got a pair
Yeah honey, I’m still a guy

Oh my eyebrows ain’t plucked
There’s a gun in my truck
Oh thank God, I’m still a guy

[dfwgator]

I never get tired of this one:

The tandem writing project

STORY:
(First paragraph by Rebecca)
At first, Laurie couldn’t decide which kind of tea she wanted. The
chamomile, which used to be her favorite for lazy evenings at home,
now reminded her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier times,
that he liked chamomile. But she felt she must now, at all costs,
keep her mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating, and if
she thought about him too much her asthma started acting up again.
So chamomile was out of the question.

---

(Second paragraph by Jim)
Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of the attack
squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4, had more important things to
think about than the neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named
Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night over a year ago. “A.S.
Harris to Geostation 17, he said into his trans- galactic communicator.
“Polar orbit established. No sign of resistance so
far...” But before he could sign off, a bluish particle beam flashed
out of nowhere and blasted a hole through his ship’s cargo bay. The
jolt from the direct hit sent him flying out of his seat and across
the cockpit.

---

(Rebecca)
He bumped his head and died almost immediately but not before he
felt one last pang of regret for psychically brutalizing the one
woman who had ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth
stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peaceful farmers
of Skylon 4. Congress Passes Law Permanently Abolishing War and
Space Travel,” Laurie read in her newspaper one morning. The news
simultaneously excited her and bored her. She stared out the window,
dreaming of her youth, when the days had passed hurriedly and
carefree, with no newspapers to read, no television to distract
her from her sense of innocent wonder at all the beautiful things
around her. “Why must one lose one’s innocence to become a woman?”
she pondered wistfully.

---

(Jim)
Little did she know, but she had less than 10 seconds to live.
Thousands of miles above the city, the Anu’udrian mothership
launched the first of its lithium fusion missiles. The dim-witted
wimpy peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace Disarmament
Treaty through the congress had left Earth a defenseless target
for the hostile alien empires who were determined to destroy the
human race. Within two hours after the passage of the treaty
the Anu’udrian ships were on course for Earth, carrying enough
firepower to pulverize the entire planet. With no one to stop
them, they swiftly initiated their diabolical plan. The lithium
fusion missile entered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President,
in his top-secret Mobile submarine headquarters on the ocean floor
off the coast of Guam, felt the inconceivably massive explosion,
which vaporized poor, stupid Laurie and 85 million other Americans.
The President slammed his fist on the conference table. “We can’t
allow this! I’m going to veto that treaty! Let’s blow ‘em out of
the sky!”

---

(Rebecca)
This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of literature.
My writing partner is a violent, chauvinistic semi-literate
adolescent.

---

(Jim)
Yeah? Well, you’re a self-centered tedious neurotic whose attempts
at writing are the literary equivalent of Valium. “Oh shall I have
chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of F-——G TEA??? Oh
no, I’m such an air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle Steele
novels.”

---

(Rebecca)
A-hole.

---

(Jim)
B—ch.

---

(Rebecca)
Wanker.

---

(Jim)
slut.

---

(Rebecca)
Get f——d.

---

(Jim)
Eat s—t.

---

(Rebecca)
F YOU - YOU NEANDERTHAL!!!

---

(Jim)
Go drink some tea - whore.

---

(Teacher)
A+ I really liked this one.

[HamiltonJay]

What they don't explain is the general feeling among women of a certain age that men have got more boring, are duller and more self-centred than the ones they used to meet. "Men don't start boring," Maeve Pollard believes, "they end up boring."

Here's the blunt truth ladies... can the psychological crap. When women reach a certain age, they are just not as cumly as they were at a younger age, as such, men are not as likely to fawn all over you and pretend to be interested in whatever topic of conversation you feel like talking about. That's the God's honest truth. The men are no less or more boring than they ever were, but they ARE much less inclined to expend the energy pretending to be interested you than they would when you were younger and hotter.

That's the facts ladies... pure and simple.

[21twelve]

“men only listen to things that matter, while women won’t shaddup about things that don’t”

My trouble is the things that matter are sometimes right in the midst of the things I’m not interested it.

“I have to go to Mary’s house to feed her cat ‘cuz her Aunt Edna is in the hospital with gallstones. Then I need to run by the store to pick up some hotdogs for the school picnic tomorrow. I was going to pick them up before but I forgot. I have chicken that I bought today and will make that for dinner. Anyway, you need to pick up Joey at 6 after practice at Field 12. After dinner I have to run up to the school for the PTA meeting ‘cuz we have to plan for the end of year party. I shouldn’t have signed up for that buy Jill was going off and they really needed someone. I can’t wait until ......”

[dfwgator]

My wife says I never pay attention to her, at least I think that’s what she said.

[Mongeaux]

These comments are much funnier than the ones on the Telegraph site. It must be true that Englishmen are boring, because Freepers are not!

[Marie2]

“I’m just not that deep.”

That is actually a very deep observation.

[AngryJawa]

“I have to go to Mary’s house to feed her cat ‘cuz her Aunt Edna is in the hospital with gallstones. Then I need to run by the store to pick up some hotdogs for the school picnic tomorrow. I was going to pick them up before but I forgot. I have chicken that I bought today and will make that for dinner. Anyway, you need to pick up Joey at 6 after practice at Field 12. After dinner I have to run up to the school for the PTA meeting ‘cuz we have to plan for the end of year party. I shouldn’t have signed up for that buy Jill was going off and they really needed someone. I can’t wait until ......”

Ah, I see you've met Mrs. Jawa. 8^)

All I want to do is interrupt and say "Get to the point", but there is no way that request won't result in additional yammering, hurt feelings, and tears. I'd rather just kick the can down the road and take my ass chewing then.

[Marie2]

(Jim) Marry me.

(Rebecca) I love you.

-—the end-—

[TexanToTheCore]

Step away from that Danielle Steele novel. Step away ma’am.

[Glenn]

Women think the only worthy subject to discuss in their presence is them.

[TigersEye]

Are Men Boring?

And how!

[east1234]

“That is actually a very deep observation.”
Didn’t seem to help any.

[wbill]

Man, I'd just be exceedingly happy if I didn't need to feign interest at everything.

"I was talking to my mother and she told me that she was talking to her neighbor's cousin's friend, you know, the lady we met that one time eight years ago who collected ceramic cows? Anyway, SHE said that...."

The girl in the cubicle next to mine prattles on for hours at times about these reality TV shows she watches. ...Talking endlessly about watching a show about people who lead fake, scripted lives. That's about as close to completely inanimate as you can get, IMHO.

[E. Cartman]

The Perfect marriage: a deaf man married to a blind woman.