Posted on 08/07/2009 3:56:37 PM PDT by Bean Counter
In a belated expression of remorse for the nuclear strikes on Hiroshima and Nagasaki sixty years ago, Congress has authorized the Army to launch apologetic nuclear strikes on two American cities. The selection of cities is not final, but they will most likely be Dallas and Houston in a nod to the Democratic desire to attack cities in a "red" state.
Former President and legendary humanitarian Jimmy Carter explained, "While sitting next to my good friend Michael Moore at the Democratic National Convention, he reminded me of his words about 9/11: 'If someone did this to get back at Bush, then they did so by killing thousands of people who DID NOT VOTE for him!' So, it only seemed natural to make amends for Hiroshima and to equalize the 9/11 impact by recommending a strike against two cities in Texas.
"I know from my experience in working with Iran that the United States provokes other nations. And we in fact provoked Japan into WWII -- and despite their repeated willingness to cease hostilities, we firebombed Tokyo, killed their suicide pilots, prevented them from violently occupying all of Asia, got angry when they tortured and killed thousands of our troops, accused them of collaborating with Nazis, and finally, without any reason, gratuitously dropped nuclear weapons on them.
The legislation's sponsor, Representative John Conyers of Michigan, pointed out that The White Man's Bomb was an affront to every sense of racial harmony -- and that it would have been a violation of the 1964 Civil Rights Act. He added, "Instead of dropping bombs, we should have extended a concerned hand towards Japan and asked them, 'Why do you hate us?'" So now, sixty years later, we ask, "Can you forgive us?" And is there any other way to ask forgiveness than to incinerate two of our own cities?
What’s with the nuking of Houston...Independance Day...that Earthquake movie a couple of months ago...Houston disappeared. Pick on someone else for a change geeezzzz.
JMO, but that piece is tasteless, not to mention humorless, and only serves to keep the notion alive that “Republicans are heartless” or some facsimile thereof. War is hell and things like this, while necessary, are not something to make light jokes of.
You have tags of “aint” and “sorry”; they should be “aint” and “funny”.
Anyone remember “Failsafe”?
I’d like to call on Congress to unclench their fist for a change.
...considering the President’s “Apology Tour” this doesn’t seem too... degrading.
The cities of Dallas and Houston were very very much in the Democrat corner.
I vote for Washington D.C. and ... hmmm, better just bomb D.C. twice.
Fine! Newyork and DC.
The matador...
On the plus side, if timed correctly we will never again have to see Sheila Jackson Lee on TV again. And those of us in the far western suburbs like Katy might come through ok, with our newly waterfront property values rising back to where they were two years ago.
"Better to be wanted by the police than not wanted at all."
Anonymous
Maybe 3 or 4 times to clean out the whole sewer.
New York and San Francisco
Very funny....
Chicago and Los Angeles
Remember it? It's in my DVD collection! Pretty shocking when it aired...
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