The first federal criminal statute, signed into law on April 30, 1790, includes only a handful of offenses: treason, counterfeiting, piracy, and murder, maiming and robbery in federal jurisdictions. It fit on to two sheets of parchment, each around 27 inches by 22 inches, and was handwritten in iron gall ink.
Guess maybe hiring the AAA Armored Car Company, and then letting them keep your cash in their safe, was not such a grand idea.
Might’ve had no choice, I don’t know.