I don’t think I have to “figure out a balance of gloomy or happy words”.... just reading the Bible and praying for guidance as the Spirit wills should be enough. The book of Jude describes how the mix of “compassionate grace preaching” and “fiery” condenmnation
preaching should be used.
Jude1:17But, beloved, remember ye the words which were spoken before of the apostles of our Lord Jesus Christ; 18How that they told you there should be mockers in the last time, who should walk after their own ungodly lusts. 19These be they who separate themselves, sensual, having not the Spirit. 20But ye, beloved, building up yourselves on your most holy faith, praying in the Holy Ghost, 21Keep yourselves in the love of God, looking for the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ unto eternal life. 22And of some have compassion, making a difference: 23And others save with fear, pulling them out of the fire; hating even the garment spotted by the flesh.
There is a place for both loving gracious witness as well as hell fire preaching! Sometimes, we must be willing to try and “shove” Christ down another’s throat...if led by the Spirit’s desperate earnestness to do so!
Please notice that it acknowledges the presence of the fire. We do not have to say one single solitary word about the fire in order for it to BE there. Some preachers think they have to put the fire there, rather than pointing out carefully how it already exists. We see the fire in this world every day, burning up hope, burning up joy, burning up love.
And this fire is burning even in this thread, some still in the flesh of Christians who are trying too hard in their flesh.
The grace will itself mirror the fire. Have you ever heard of the kind of mild shame called being sheepish? As the world might put it, it’s the “Wow, I could have had a V-8” moment? (Except they “ought to” have had the V-8.) That is what should result from grace preaching.