Farting is inevitable. Shaking the covers after farting in bed is just rude.
Pulling the covers over her head is just poor technique. Here’s how to do it properly:
1. When you feel a big one coming on, place both arms over the covers on your chest to hold them down.
2. Next, slowly, quietly lift the covers with the foot on her side of the bed.
3. As you let it rip, simultaneously drop your elevated foot while lifting the covers in front of her face.
Properly done, the covers make a bellows and push the gaseous emissions up her nose.
Now, try to pretend you’re asleep. If you start laughing you’re dead.