Posted on 04/22/2017 10:08:44 AM PDT by Jyotishi
Richard Simons has eaten “Wood” for a long time and look where that got him.
So he eats, leaves, and shoots?
“Bear Grylls”
This Paki must sleep a lot.
Bears eat a lot of roughage in the fall to plug up their butts in order to conserve their precious bodily solids and fluids during their long winter sleep.
(From the “I Didn’t Really Care To Know That/TMI” dept.)
A panda walks into a café. He orders a sandwich, eats it, then draws a gun and proceeds to fire it at the other patrons.
“Why?” asks the confused, surviving waiter amidst the carnage, as the panda makes towards the exit. The panda produces a badly punctuated wildlife manual and tosses it over his shoulder.
“Well, I’m a panda,” he says. “Look it up.”
The waiter turns to the relevant entry in the manual and, sure enough, finds an explanation.
“Panda. Large black-and-white bear-like mammal, native to China. Eats, shoots and leaves.”
In the western Himalayas the bears just eat a Butt.
So he eats, leaves, and shoots?
++++
Way too many commas.
But, wait, maybe, not. Could, be, I, was, just, missing, your, main, point.
Maybe it’s “eats, shoots, and leaves.” The comma abuse is intentional.
The comma abuse is intentional.
++++
I know that.
I was just trying and failing to match your very, very (sorry for the redundancy) clever comment.
It was very clever. It would be nice if we saw more of this sort of thing here at good old FR. Freepers need to lighten up once in awhile. Things are actually going pretty good for us right now.
I can’t take credit for it. It’s actually the title of a book on grammar and punctuation (that most internet users could take lessons from, IMHO).
After dinner he leaves his favorite restaurant branch, with knots in his stomach then falls in to bed. No one is around to hear it.
So someone actually eats roots shoots and leaves.
Euwell Gibbons would be envious.
Yeah? And i know folks who smoke, drink eat greasy fat ladened food and crap food who haven’t been sick ever either-
The problem with anecdotal examples like the above is that this man’s constitution is such that he rarely gets sick no matter what he would eat- BUT he claims it’s the wood and leaves that keeps him healthy-
That is like saying something silly like “I chew bubble gum and have never gotten a corn, therefore bubble gum prevents corns” or “I throw a football twice a day, and have never had liver cancer- therefore throwing footballs prevents liver cancer”
Guess it is ‘time’ for me to roll out one of my very favorite factoids....
EVERYONE WHO ATE BEANS DURING THE CIVIL WAR DIED.
Syntactic ambiguity (also called amphiboly or amphibology) is when a series of words may be interpreted in more than one way due to ambiguity of their arrangement or punctuation. For example:
That that is is that that is not is not is that it it is
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/That_that_is_is_that_that_is_not_is_not_is_that_it_it_is
Tougher ones:
James while John had had had had had had had had had had had a better effect on the teacher
Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo
(The last one only requires a period at the end. It means “Bison from Buffalo, New York who are intimidated by other bison in their community also happen to intimidate other bison in their community.”)
I’ve discovered that tears rolling from my eyes while laughing and trying and mostly failing to figure out those “had had”s and “Buffalo buffalo”s don’t transform directly to HTML. Too bad. Someone at FR needs to work on that.
But apparently it has put his butt in a Meh mood. 8>)
“Remember Euell Gibbons?”
Yes — and (IMHO) every survivalist should read his books. There’s a lot of very good (and tasty) food in the wilderness. We cultivate only a tiny fraction of the total number of edible plants (and I’m not talking about wood). I’ve gone on camping trips where I packed no food — just one of Gibbons’ books. Foraging kept me well fed.
(There may be newer and better books on the subject — I stopped looking after finding Gibbons.)
what about grass?
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