You summarized the Dems correctly - and it sounds like you’re coming around to understanding them. And keep mind you can NEVER apply our values to them...they are simply alien to them.
I believe I have understood them for a very long time. I don’t understand why they are that way, really. But I do understand they ARE that way. But it/they are getting worse, day by day, year by year. Some day something will have to give.