I completely get your point. Sadly, I think the word "gay" is lost.
I remember when I started studying French in the 1970s, the word "gai" actually meant "happy." These days, even in French, the word has lost its original meaning.
I think that the homosexual community appropriated the word for the precise fact that they are, for the most part, deeply unhappy, and must always pretend otherwise.
Maybe, but that's no reason to knuckle under to the left and use it. Homosexual does not trip off the tongue as easily as gay, but it will annoy the leftist haters of truth.