“I’m sorry your son is dead, but he was never really living anyway.”
The second half of your statement appears to nullify any expression of sympathy in the first. It would be very harsh to say this in person to the grieving mother, and never come across as a genuine expression of sympathy.
I understand why this mother made her “in lieu of flowers” request, even if it is not completely correct assignment of responsibility for her son’s drug addiction. I may have expressed similar sentiments too. Recently, our President made a public comment about the death penalty for drug dealers. Her opinion appears to be aligned with his. If she had instead said that she supported the President’s position in light of what happened to her, the article would have had a much different narrative. Hence, would you object to the President’s statement for the same reason you object to hers? Just asking.
Yesterday, I had the rare opportunity to be patted down like an apprehended subject in order to enter a jail facility. I attended an event where 30 inmates had successfully passed an in house rehab program. These are human beings who are responsible for their drug problems, and some of them will probably fall again when they go back into the streets. I did not hear one of them who spoke about recovery blame their problem on a drug dealer. The scourge of drugs is devastating, the suffering, pain, health problems, even death these souls and their families have endured, and some may continue to endure once out. I don’t have a simple solution to this problem. But I what I have seen is that those who turned their lives over to God and had the positive support structures to continue recovery have been successful. Kicking them when they are down is not going to help. Addiction is so powerful that shear will power and (learning to or) making good decisions is not enough to overcome it. I grieve for this woman’s loss of her son.