A bad marriage can seriously damage your health, say scientists

The Guardian ^ | 7/16/18 | Layal Liverpool

[Rebelbase]

A bad marriage with frequent conflicts could have a serious detrimental impact on your health, according to psychologists.

The researchers at the universities of Nevada and Michigan monitored 373 heterosexual couples to investigate whether disagreeing about multiple topics – such as children, money, in-laws and leisure activities – had negative health implications.

“We followed married couples over the first 16 years of marriage and compared the subjective health of wives and husbands who reported a greater number of conflict topics to those who reported fewer,” said Rosie Shrout, who presented the preliminary results at the International Association for Relationship Research conference in Colorado.

The researchers found that marital conflict negatively affected health for both husbands and wives, although there was a greater impact of conflict on men than women. Couples who agreed with each other more experienced health benefits early on in their relationships, but this protective effect wore off in the later years of marriage.

The health ratings were calculated by asking spouses to answer questions about their health, including whether their health interfered with their work, if they were healthy enough to do the things they wanted to do, if they were having trouble sleeping, if they were bothered by nervousness and feeling fidgety, and whether they were troubled by headaches.

Conflict in a relationship can lead to damaging responses in the body such as inflammation, changes in appetite and increased release of stress hormones, all of which can affect numerous aspects of health ranging from heart function to the immune system, previous research has found.

[Elsie]

You've been warned!

 

Proverbs 11:22 “A beautiful woman who lacks discretion is like a gold ring in a pig’s snout.”

 

Proverbs 12:4 “A wife with strength of character is the crown of her husband, but the wife who disgraces him is like bone cancer.”

 

Proverbs 14:1 “A wise woman builds her home, but a foolish woman tears it down with her own hands.”

 

Proverbs 21:19 “Better to live in a desert than with a quarrelsome and nagging wife.”

 

Proverbs 25:24 “It is better to live in a corner of the housetop than in a house shared with a quarrelsome wife.”

 

Proverbs 27:15-16 “A continual dripping on a rainy day and a contentious wife are alike. Trying to keep her in check is like stopping a wind storm or grabbing oil with your right hand.”

 

 

 

[Yaelle]

I am so easy going in general that I was a placating wife and tried to please. So the husbands were able to control me too much. It was a bad balance. That is never happening again. I can run my own life now and no one is holding me back or ripping me off. I’m happy for every happy marriage but to me a good marriage looks a lot like a glittery unicorn.

[Dilbert San Diego]

Yes you are right. The bad behavior and problems in marriage go both ways. Some men treat their wives badly, I know.

[Albion Wilde]

Almost everyone I know who had gotten a divorce lost at least 30 lbs. Which just goes to show, just losing weight, doesn’t make you healthier.

Losing that much weight rapidly at an age when your thyroid can't adjust quickly enuogh can ruin your heart health, your eyesight and your joints.

[Albion Wilde]

The better solution is marital counseling with someone other than a harpy who will hate on the husband and blame him for everything.

Or a good ol' boy who will take business referrals from the husband and treat the wife like an impediment to human betterment.

[PIF]

it seems that women tend to want things to be a certain way, expect their men to be a certain way, and when their men fail to live up to expectation, fail to adhere to the criteria set by the women, that’s when conflict happens. And the man tends to be on the losing side.

—

Or in so many words: women with lists.

[Clutch Martin]

My dad literally survived 3 wars. Was torpedoed and sunk in the frigid North Atlantic... and didn’t talk much about Korea and Vietnam.

Thinking back he, like many of that generation grew up hard, went to war, and probably suffered PTSD, which either rendered them inert, or crazy, or mean. Pops was a bit of each and applied alcohol to ease the struggle. I was about 40 when I as a vet and my peer group put it all together.

I am not as hard hearted as I once conditioned myself to be, and I’ve been a few places in life where pops dared tread... damn those guys had it tough. I’m thankful I didn’t worry the old man like my sisters did.

God Bless them all.

[ataDude]

No kidding? I am greatly surprised! /s