After watching the movies, I realized Orks just wanted a good dental plan at affordable cost. Dictatorial men refused to raise taxes on the wealthy, so the Orks protested in the only way left open to them in the orkaphobic society of “Middle Earth”.
The wars of Middle Earth were rooted in bad teeth. Figures the Brit journalist writing about it wouldn’t figure it out. The whole thing could have been solved, as all thing can be, by raising taxes on the rich. Dental care for ALL!