Be sure to seal it up real good.
How about a plain exterior for the package you set out, but inside the first layer it’s addressed to “Dr ____ ____, Ebola Research Group, Your Town, USA” and inside that is an old poorly sealed jar of slightly off mayonnaise.
That might be fun. I suppose these porch pirates follow delivery trucks around so they can beat their rivals to the porches. Sad to think anyone would be that cynical, but hey, some friends of mine were on a photography shoot in a foreign land, they went around a corner to get a better view, and all their cameras were gone from the picnic table thirty seconds later.
I’m guessing that Clock Boy doesn’t lose too many of his deliveries, it’s the ticking ...