Ban hands and feet! If only we would remove these dangerous weapons from everybody, why, we would save more than half again as many people as are killed with all long guns.
We need common sense hand and feet safety legislation. That of course means we need to chop off everybody’s hands and feet. It’s for their own good. We know best.
Common sense also includes lobotomy, beheading. Maybe if we wait a bit we can see them covered under the ACA Obamacare.