Here’s the problem: Women who have one definition of success, a high income.
If both have high incomes that is good for both. If only she has than he has to see, than he has to see, then he has to see that he catches up.
There is also the incredible level of hypergamy going on. Women on dating apps are fighting over the top 20% and refuse to consider decent middle class guys who aren’t perfect on looks and aren’t in the top quintile of income because they see (to them) so many better choices.
If you were in a smaller community, your choices are obvious, and when alpha and beta are taken, you start looking at the next available options.