When in doubt, scream “Worse than Watergate!!”
Or just add “gate” to the end of a word or two and make the most innocuous of things seem illegal. Hellogate, goodbyegate, eatinggate, sleepgate, drinkgate, breathgate, anygate, everygate, allgate, all the timegate.
Then bring in Carl Bernstein to give the official “it’s just like Watergate” seal of approval and there you go.
Commigate Coup