Posted on 06/26/2002 8:03:48 AM PDT by shuckmaster
Dear President Bush,
Could I ask you for a little favor? Since you're already going to the trouble of ensuring the right of self-determination for Palestinians, could you please let the South in on the same deal?
Here are the things you said in Monday's speech that you're going to do for the Palestinians. I've provided some helpful little comments beside your remarks that will make clear what we Southerners would like:
"The Palestinian parliament should have the full authority of a legislative body. Local officials and government ministers need authority of their own and the independence to govern effectively." Since the Founding Fathers created a "Republic of Republics" to guarantee State Sovereignty, we're supposed to have local independence, but someone forgot to tell Washington DC. For example, the Federal Department of Energy has forced the governor of South Carolina to allow plutonium to be dumped at the Savannah River Site. With all this talk about Islamic terrorists planning to use "dirty bombs" against civilians, it makes sense not to make ammunition any more convenient than necessary. The governor is best qualified to protect the safety of his own people, but the Federal courts have ruled otherwise. Please reprimand those responsible for this violation of State sovereignty.
"The United States, along with others in the international community, will help the Palestinians organize and monitor fair, multiparty local elections." Mr. President, you're probably not aware of the roadblocks we've run into trying to put the Southern Party on the ballot. Neither the Democrats or Republicans have to obtain the signatures of thousands of voters to get on the ballot. This is very expensive and time-consuming for a grass-roots movement that seeks to give Southern voters the right to make a meaningful choice, instead of having to vote for one of two Big-Business/Big-Government candidates. If you could just have Dick Cheney make a few phone calls to elections officials, I'm sure you could ensure that Southerners could have the same right to meaningful elections as you're going to provide Palestinians.
"You have a rich culture, and you share the aspirations of men and women in every culture." It's nice of you to recognize Palestinian culture, but our indigenous Southern culture is targeted for extinction right here in the US. Now I'm sure this is a BIG oversight. Southern culture is also a rich culture, but symbols of our culture are being systematically removed in a deliberate campaign of cultural genocide. The rich, well-connected NAACP has declared that it will remove all of our symbols from sight. Under pressure from this group, one candidate for president even had Confederate plaques removed from the Texas Supreme Court building.
That's all for now. It would be nice to see our tax dollars being used for our own people's benefit before being used for folks on the other side of the world, but we Southerners are real patient. We also have long memories--so anything you can do for us will certainly be remembered.
Yes indeed!
Under pressure from this group, one candidate for president even had Confederate plaques removed from the Texas Supreme Court building.
ROTF! Left off the sarcasm tag?
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