"What are you going to do, go down to every rectory at midnight and check to see if the priests are alone? Or if there are little boys around? They all take a vow of celibacy."
Well, moron, for starters you obey the Vatican and make sure none of them are butt cowboys. That way you don't have to worry about whether there are little boys around.
And if any slide through, the first complaint or two should give you a hint.