Posted on 04/14/2005 5:56:15 PM PDT by TheStickman
It's been a year since we 1st filed the paperwork. I just received notice today of the Decree of Joinder of Issues.
I don't anticipate my ex will try to fight the annulment. I'll be surprised if she even answers the questionare. My biggest concern is the things which are relevant to the defects in the marriage were never publicly aired or shared with friends and such. Therefore there aren't any witnesses to anything except "They were married" and "then they were divorced" and "the husband was a pig" (sadly correct) and the 2 people I listed as witnesses I chose primarily because I knew they would tell the truth as they see it and would fill out the paperwork and remember to send it in!
We live the diocese of Charleston, SC.
Thank you for your prayers. We won't ever give up hope. The Presence of Christ in the Eucharist will never allow us to lose hope.
(except that speaking against the Holy Spirit thing, and I don't understand that).
I'm surprised you would say that. I mean, you know Latin and stuff. Isn't that stuff along the lines of John Francois and Teddy the Swimmer and others like them standing on the steps of the church, welcoming the admiration to them as Catholics (say it Cat-oh-leeks, like my Presbyterian mom-in-law jokes to get the full effect) and then voting four-square for partial birth abortion, etc. Isn't that the sort of behaviour that is meant by "speaking against the holy spirit"?
"the husband was a pig" (sadly correct)"
Well Stick, let me say this, at least, I'm very glad you are not a pig anymore, and I'm sure God is glad of that too. Can't help you with any of the legalistic stuff, but hang in there now non-piggish man! Hang in!
"Isn't that stuff along the lines of"
No, it was an admission of ignorance. It was an admission that I don't understand exactly what does and doesn't fall into the category of that sin, and why that one is the only unforgiveable one.
"I mean, you know Latin and stuff."
It's a lot easier to learn a little Latin than it is to understand the entirety of the Scriptures...although learning a little Latin does help.
"Isn't that the sort of behaviour that is meant by "speaking against the holy spirit"?"
I hope not, and I don't think so. I don't see how saying you don't understand something is equivalent to speaking against it.
"Blasphemy against the Holy Ghost"
Well, that was certainly a lot of information. However, I can't say that I had an "Oh, now I get it" moment.
Guess I need an explanation that's more "dumbed down."
I reckon there will come a day that I too, will be asking many questions about annulment...not of my own, but of the guy I might marry someday.
Keep the faith. I know I do.
Now I am a cradle Catholic Gaelic-speaking Irish Catholic raised all around the world and find myself most at home among Arabic-speaking Catholics of the Eastern rites. What you cannot accomplish juridically at this moment -- because of your lack of status -- you can address by prayer, fasting, sacrifices and by asking the prayers of St. Joseph and St. Mary -- who faced their own difficulties, if you recall. Also, the Eastern Catholic rites remind me that prayers to St. Boaz and St. Ruth are also very worthwhile. While the Roman Rite doesn't spend any time on them or asking for their intercession, why don't you ask their intercession. My father always liked to ask for their prayers when my husband and I were newly married and I was such an incredible hothead. I still am but my father's prayers yet endure, and my dear husband Himself is a saint of a fellow.
God bless ye both. Hold on to hope in Christ.
**Hold onto hope. The annulment process for converts makes no sense at all.**
Yes it does, because the church recognizes as valid the marriage between any baptized man and woman. Baptist man and Episcopal woman, both baptized, the church recognizes their marriage. Non-Catholic, baptized in their protestant church and Catholic get married in the non-Catholic church, the church still recognizes their marriage.
Have you ever attended a speaker from a Tribunal explaining the four points of validity? I just listened to one last night at our church.
That isn't what I was talking about. But thanks for the points in your post.
You are thinking too much. Satan is working on you but not in the manner you suspect. Also, be on guard against being overly legalistic. That can be difficult, especially for new Catholics, but the laws exist for the advancement of the soul on the spiritual path, not vice versa (the soul existing for the law).
Start some devotional practices. A structured prayer life (Rosary in Latin, the Divine Office, Adoration, etc) will keep you progressing even though the externals are not yet in place. Read the lives of the mystic saints. The Church is there to support you in the salvation of your soul. If you are worrying, you are not trusting. Your battle is within.
Thanks gbc, it appears I am at least somewhat mistaken about what this sin really is; but I gotta agree with dsc I too could use a more "dumbed down" explanation!
Can all sins be forgiven?
"Yes all sins, however great, can be forgiven, through the infinitum merits of Christ, Who is God.
"The repentant sinner is told in Scripture: 'If your sins be as scarlet, they shall be made white as snow.' (Is 1:17)"
1. God is always ready to forgive our sins, no matter how great or how many they are, if we are truly sorry for them. No actual sin can be forgiven without sorrow and repentance on the part of the sinner.
"Our Lord said: 'I say to you that, even so, there will be joy in heaven over one sinner who repents, more than over ninety-nine just who have no need of repentance." (Luke 15:7)"
2. "The sin against the Holy Ghost which Christ warned us would not be forgiven in heaven or on earth is persistent impenitence, the sin of one who rejects conversion and dies in mortal sin. One guilty of this sin can never obtain forgiveness of God, because at the hour of death he continues to thrust God away from him."
" A man mortally wounded cannot have any hope of cure if he not only refuses to listen to his doctors, but shuts his mouth against all medicines, and kicks away all medical instruments of help. Even Judas would have been pardoned if had asked asked for forgiveness and made a sincere act of contrition before his death"
Taken from:
Ch. 75, The Forgiveness of Sins, pg. 151. (Which just happens to be my favorite little catechism)
I have always been taught that the sin against the Holy Ghost is refusing to be contrite and seek God's forgiveness, either through pride, by thinking you have no need of forgiveness, or through despair, thinking that your sins are too great to be forgiven.
I hope that helps.
Any and all of the suffering you experience during this time, the doubt, the anxiety, the sadness, as well as any suffering resulting from abstaining from marital relations, may be offered to Our Lord's Most Sacred Heart, as an act of love and in reparation for past sins. This time may really be a grace from Our Lord, an opportunity to grow in virtues of patience and humility. Instead of viewing your situation as an attack by the evil one, see it as an extraordinary gift of grace the Lord is giving you, an opportunity to suffer for His sake through passive acceptance of God's will. All of these sufferings, united to Our Lord's sacrifice, accepted in trust, obedience and humility, will be jewels in your crown of glory in heaven, the crown He Himself will award you, upon final perseverance.
From one 'dummy' to another, ping to #29 for a more 'dumbed down' explanation. ;-)
oh that crazy spell check, one little slip of mouse = )
Thank you for your kind, hopeful words. You are right in that at times, this process makes no sense. Add to it the fact our parish has held information regarding just the process close to the vest--as if it were some state secret and there are days when I wonder who's looking out for who's best interest.
For instance, no one has EVER sat down with us and explained the entire process. No one! I didn't know the Decree of Joinder of Issues was step 3 of the 8 step annulment process till I looked it up on the net AND it's ONLY been a YEAR since we started the process. That it's never occurred to someone the value of letting us know what's what amazes me. Add to the the fact that each time you call or leave a message or send an email you have to play *squeaky wheel* in order to get a response and you can understand why I wrote the inital post in the 1st place.
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