Posted on 09/04/2005 12:44:12 PM PDT by TheStickman
My wife had another idea. Do you know if any of your ex-wife's friends are now separated or divorced? Perhaps an ex-husband or ex-boyfriend would be willing to fill out a form for you? Surely they would have been privy to your actions.
I greatly appreciate you and your's wife's good ideas. Thank you so much for taking the time to offer them!
Your wife is one smart woman. That was something I too wondered. It is most definitely to be looked into because relationships change and TheStickman may have an a "friendly" out there he doesn't realize.
You just never know, my friend. We are always the worst judge of what people know about us. Also, whatever they could add -- even some rumors -- could help to characterize what is now just a void created by the non-response of others.
Also, don't be afraid to contact them and have them tell you, "Go to hell." Jump in there and offer it up. Some of them may have become Catholic -- you never know.... Some may not know anything but they just might pray for you. Your own story of redemption could be a great inspiration to them.
I remember either their nicknames or their 1st names. That's it. These events occurred between 10 and 20 years ago in some instances and since I was such a lousy husband for the most part, her friends weren't around much, if at all after our 2nd year together.
I have no clue if any of her friends were Catholic. Religion was something I avoided at all costs during those days.
Can. 1143 ˜1. A marriage entered into by two non-baptized persons is dissolved by means of the pauline privilege in favor of the faith of the party who has received baptism by the very fact that a new marriage is contracted by the same party, provided that the non-baptized party departs. ˜2. The non-baptized party is considered to depart if he or she does not wish to cohabit with the baptized party or to cohabit peacefully without aVront to the Creator unless the baptized party, after baptism was received, has given the other a just cause for departing.
If she's not responding to inquiries, as you've stated, then there simply should be no issue...as long as the tribunal is appraised of the fact that she wasn't baptized.
The other question I'd have is if you have been baptized? (I think I asked that earlier; you may or may not have answered...but I can't find the answer). If you weren't/aren't then that needs to be clearly pointed out to the tribunal, as well. Frankly, I don't believe that there can be a valid marriage between two unbaptized persons.
Regardless, I'm curious what the response was to your bringing those items up?
I did mention the Petrine Privilege to one of the case advocates working with the tribunal. She informed me this would require a personal one-one-one interview with my ex-wife and detailed corresspondence with Rome. Essentially the lady told me that as slow as the annulment process is in this dicocese, it would seem like a quick sprint in the park compared to the time and expense of seeking the Petrine Privilege.
Yes, I was baptized. Immersed in water in the Name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.
A dear priest who celebrates daily Mass at the parish I now attend informed me there was an obvious "defect of cult" and he would get back to me after he investigated the issue more fully. So more to come on that matter, I hope, one day soon.
Oh my.
I've met such people.
One of the folks who were at my wedding, in fact the woman also video-taped the wedding and the reception was one of my witnesses who answered the questionaire the Tribunal sent her!!! However, since I didn't advertise my bad behavior she nor her husband (who was one of my ushers) had any knowledge of what was going on years into the marriage.
Last time I asked my ex-wife about filling out the questionaire a few months ago she responded, "I just don't have the time and it was enough for me to see you were finally coming clean." So she nor her parents nor mine is going to budge.
Same with the parents of both sides. They've said "no" and like it or not, I have to honor that.
Well, sorry to hear that. As I said in the previous thread, I can appreciate what you're dealing with and that was my one suggestion.
I'm honestly of mixed emotions on this. On one hand, I feel for you, a person who is trying to do things the "right" way. On the other hand, I'm glad they're making annulments more difficult, because of the past abuses with them.
Its just a pity that in doing the good thing (making annulments more difficult) you end up having to go through the same bureaucracy.
"they thought it would keep me from becoming Catholic"
You were married outside the church? Why do you need an annulment?
I'm converting to the Catholic Church and they tell me I need one because I remarried.
My wife was married before she met me at the age of 18. She got a divorce at the age of 20. She met me many years later and we married. The priest said during marriage prep: don't worry about it. And we never looked back. She asked me again about it last year.
In retrospect, my wife's marriage was invalid because she was a baptized Catholic but never asked for a dispensation from canonical form.
You and your former wife were baptized I take it? Married in a protestant church?
I was baptized in the Church of Christ. My 1st wife was never baptized.
I'm not Catholic...please explain how annulment works...from an outsiders perspective it seems a ridiculous concept, but I would like to gain some understanding...
respectfully...
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