Replies

I have gotten her to accept that the Catholic Church is the Church founded by Christ, however she thinks it has gone totally astray. Anyway, her major problem is the refusal to accept the idea of confessing to men i.e. Priests. Anyone have any advice?

1. Be patient. Then,
2. Be even more patient. Others will give you doctrinal thoughts, and those are good, but where you convert a spouse is in your (and her) heart. You’ve been willing to talk about it patiently with her, and that is the first key. Knowing the doctrine is important, of course, as you need to be able to meet her objections rationally, but meeting them patiently is even better.
3. Let her see how big of a deal that first confession is for you, and how much better you feel afterwards. Every time you go to confession, let her see how much of a weight it lifts from your shoulders, and be sure you treat her well afterwards (go get a dairy queen to celebrate or something). You don’t need to say anything, she will see it, and know. You may have already heard this from others, but going to confession tends to leave most people in a great mood, weight off their shoulders, etc. Just don’t try to hide that, and she will see what a difference confession makes. That reality is a pretty powerful statement. Words and arguments are great, reality is even better. So let her see that reality, and your joy.

At your first confession, do you try to go back and confess everything that you know you have done? How specific is it? Can I say "I have lusted after lots of women" or do I have to list every one? That could go on all night. LOL.

Its called a general confession, and you can do one from time to time if you want (even after your first). You can be pretty general, its up to you. I don’t list every time I’ve committed each sin, like you say, it would take a while. I’d list each category out, and probably focus more on the ones that have been a real hindrance to you. One other thought, if you can, its nice to schedule some time with the priest, rather than getting in a large line on Sat. afternoon. You probably want all the time you can get to go through these things, and its more relaxing if no one is waiting.

patent