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Benedict XVI
pope from 2005 to 2013
Encyclical letter "Deus caritas est", § 9-11

"The two shall become one flesh"

In the world of the Bible, God's relationship with Israel is described using the metaphors of betrothal and marriage; idolatry is thus adultery and prostitution… But God's eros for man is also totally agape. This is not only because it is bestowed in a completely gratuitous manner, without any previous merit, but also because it is love which forgives… In this biblical vision, on the one hand we find ourselves before a strictly metaphysical image of God: God is the absolute and ultimate source of all being; but this universal principle of creation—the Logos, primordial reason—is at the same time a lover with all the passion of a true love. Eros is thus supremely ennobled, yet at the same time it is so purified as to become one with agape… The first novelty of biblical faith consists… in its image of God. The second, essentially connected to this, is found in the image of man.

The biblical account of creation speaks of the solitude of Adam, the first man, and God's decision to give him a helper… The idea is certainly present that man is somehow incomplete, driven by nature to seek in another the part that can make him whole, the idea that only in communion with the opposite sex can he become “complete”. The biblical account thus concludes with a prophecy about Adam: “Therefore a man leaves his father and his mother and cleaves to his wife and they become one flesh” (Gen 2:24).

Two aspects of this are important. First, eros is somehow rooted in man's very nature; Adam is a seeker, who “abandons his mother and father” in order to find woman; only together do the two represent complete humanity and become “one flesh”. The second aspect is equally important. From the standpoint of creation, eros directs man towards marriage, to a bond which is unique and definitive; thus, and only thus, does it fulfil its deepest purpose. Corresponding to the image of a monotheistic God is monogamous marriage. Marriage based on exclusive and definitive love becomes the icon of the relationship between God and his people and vice versa. God's way of loving becomes the measure of human love.

A Christian Pilgrim

JESUS’ TEACHING ON MARRIAGE

(A biblical refection on THE 27^th SUNDAY IN ORDINARY TIME [YEAR B] – 7 October 2018)

Gospel Reading: Mark 10:2-16

First Reading: Genesis 2:18-24; Psalms: Psalm 128:1-6; Second Reading: Hebrews 2:9-11

The Scripture Text

And Pharisees came up and in order to test Him asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” He answered them, “What did Moses command you?” They said, “Moses allowed a man to write a certificate of divorce, and to put her away.” But Jesus said to them, “For your hardness of heart he wrote you this commandment. But from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’ For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one. So they are no longer two but one. What therefore God has joined together, let not man put asunder.”

And in the house the disciples asked Him again about this matter. And He said to them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another, commits adultery against her; and if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.”

And they were bringing children to Him, that He might touch them; and the disciples rebuked them. But when Jesus saw it He was indignant and said to them, “Let the children come to Me, do not hinder them; for to such belongs the Kingdom of God. Truly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the Kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it.” And He took them in His arms and blessed them, laying His hands upon them. (Mark 10:2-16 RSV)

The Jewish faith has a great respect for marriage, but it also recognizes that divorce is possible under certain conditions. In Deuteronomy 24:1, there is a law permitting a man to divorce his wife if he finds some “indecency” in her. In Jesus’ day, there were two different ways the rabbis interpreted this passage.

One group of rabbis taught indecency meant adultery and they believed a man could divorce his wife only if she was unfaithful to him. Another group said indecency pertained to trivial matters like being a lousy cook or embarrassing her husband in public. You can guess which of these two interpretations of the law was more popular.

Although the man could divorce his wife, the wife could not divorce her husband without his permission . Even then, Jewish law recognized only a few conditions under which this was possible (e.g., if he became a leper or raped a virgin). This unequal treatment undoubtedly was the result of the male dominated society.

When a man decided to divorce his wife, he had only to write a note declaring his intention to divorce her (that’s the decree of divorce in today’s Gospel) and then give this note to her in the presence of witnesses. It was that easy!

Quoting Genesis 2, Jesus rejects the liberal understanding of divorce and says marriage is forever. A man who divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery. Likewise, a woman who divorces her husband and marries another man also commits adultery.

This teaching poses many problems for Christians who want to uphold the sanctity of marriage but also want to show compassion for those who realize they made a mistake. Did Jesus mean that a couple who are in a bad marriage must either stay married for the rest of their lives or remain single if they choose to get a divorce? Or was Jesus speaking about the ideal for which all of us should strive but not necessarily attain?

Different Christian denominations answer these questions in a variety of ways, some permitting divorce and remarriage, others prohibiting it, and still others granting annulments. The one thing certain about this issue is that it will continue to be the focus of theological and scriptural debates for many years to come.

Because divorce is often a very painful experience, those who are going through it need to be supported and prayed for, not condemned.

(Adapted from Jerome J. Sabatowich, Cycling Through the Gospels – Gospel Commentaries for Cycles A, B, and C, pages 210-211.)

Prayer: Lord Jesus, help us to overcome all disunity. Pour out Your grace on every family that has been through divorce. Heal them and restore their hope. Let Your love flow in all of us and flow out of us so that we might be Your witnesses. Amen.