Your thoughts parallel mine. I have no problem believing that He always existed, but I often question the teaching that He has a personal interest in me. I have not experienced it and I cannot force myself to believe it.
If God wanted to spread a belief in Him, why did he create only one son, Jesus, and plant Him in Israel?
Why didn't God send multiple sons to all the nations of the world to spread His word? His lack of action in the above just doesn't make sense ............
God does care for us and does love us. NOTE: This passage of Scripture applies to those who believe in Christ as Savior.
31What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who is against us? 32He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him over for us all, how will He not also with Him freely give us all things? 33Who will bring a charge against Gods elect? God is the one who justifies; 34who is the one who condemns? Christ Jesus is He who died, yes, rather who was raised, who is at the right hand of God, who also intercedes for us. 35Who will separate us from the love of Christ? Will tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? 36Just as it is written, FOR YOUR SAKE WE ARE BEING PUT TO DEATH ALL DAY LONG; WE WERE CONSIDERED AS SHEEP TO BE SLAUGHTERED. 37But in all these things we overwhelmingly conquer through Him who loved us. 38For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, 39nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:31-39 NASB
Jesus is God come in the flesh. Whatever Jesus did He did as the Father directed Him.
So whatever you see Jesus doing is a direct reflection of the Father’s heart and what the Father would do if He were here on earth.
All you have to do is look and see how Jesus related to the downtrodden and hurting. The only ones He was hard on were the religious leaders who were such hypocrites.
I’ll tell you, any god who comes to earth, goes through a 9 month gestation, goes through the tedium of growing up, learning to walk and talk, just like any other human being, who WALKED everywhere, and spent untold hours teaching and healing people, CARES about His people.
He didn’t HAVE to do it.
None of those people whom Jesus met and ministered to on His life here on earth were any more or less worthy of His attention than you are.
And believe me, I do and can understand the feeling that God doesn’t care. Been there, done that, and I still sometimes wrestle with that.
There are no easy answers for those of us in the midst of the fiery furnace of affliction.
I know that it’s small and cold comfort to be told you are not alone in your suffering and that other people feel as abandoned by God as you do. But you are not as alone as you maybe, perhaps think.