Posted on 01/12/2024 10:25:13 PM PST by Morgana
Claudia Paulk published a book about the trauma she suffered after a coerced abortion. Pregnant With A Baby She Wanted
Paulk’s parents were Christians and very active in their church.
She became pregnant at 19. Her boyfriend responded with “joy and positive emotions.” They both wanted the baby.
A few days after the pregnancy test, the couple went out. Paulk says:
It was one of the only wonderful memories I had of my pregnancy because it was the last time I was joyful about becoming a mother. For a moment, everything seemed blissful as I felt confident about my life with a growing belly.
Concerns About the Relationship With the Father
But her relationship with her boyfriend was far from ideal. He’d once pushed her while drunk, and she saw a red flag. So, she planned to end the relationship, and if needed, fight for custody.
Poulk was living at home and dependent on her parents, and without a solid relationship with her boyfriend, she needed their support. Pressured Into Abortion by her Christian Mother
Paulk had already told her mother she was sexually active. Her mother had only smiled and thanked Paulk for telling her. Poulk doesn’t mention anything about her mother discouraging her or talking about birth control.
But when Paulk told her mother she was pregnant, her mother was furious.
Paulk says:
I felt her disappointment when she wouldn’t look me in the eyes, and she refused to get close to me… Her words broke me into a million pieces as she said, ‘You are not keeping this baby, I am taking you to have an abortion.’
Paulk’s stepfather agreed.
Paulk pleaded with her mother, but the more she begged to keep her baby, the angrier her mother became.
A few days went by, and Paulk desperately hoped her mother would change her mind. She says, “I hoped that under her anger and disappointment, my mother would grow a soft and caring heart overnight for the child that I was carrying, or at least for me.”
But her mother made the abortion appointment. Fear, Lack of Support, and Wishes for Parental Love
Paulk doesn’t really know why her Christian parents demanded she have an abortion, but she wonders if their fear of what others in the church would think played a role.
She had always wanted her parents’ approval and was terrified of raising a baby and going through a court battle on her own.
Even though Poulk’s boyfriend was excited about being a father and had been picking out baby names, he gave in to her mother’s demands and agreed to pay for half the abortion.
After the arrangements were made, Paulk says, “It seemed as though I wasn’t being neglected as much. Therefore, I knew what I needed to do to gain my parents’ love and respect.” At the Abortion Facility
She says that sitting in the abortion facility waiting room felt “gut-wrenching.”
She begged her boyfriend to come to the facility with her, but he left during the abortion, wrestling with his own grief.
When the abortion worker called her name, Paulk said she felt as though she were “trying to run away from a serial killer chasing after me with a machete.” Not Allowed to See the Ultrasound
Staff did an ultrasound, but refused to let her see her baby:
I desperately wanted to see him. I wanted to see my baby. I wanted to see how big he was, I wanted to hear his heartbeat… I wasn’t allowed to. The technician hid the screen away from my sight as she took measurements of my baby.
Poulk was haunted by the thought that the only people on earth who saw her baby were the ones who killed him. Two Grieving Parents
The night after the abortion, her parents went to Bible study, leaving Paulk alone, lying in the dark and crying. She wrote a poem dedicated to her baby, hoping that, somehow, the message would get to him.
Her boyfriend came over. Her parents had forbidden her to see him, but she says, “I was tired of following their rules and trying to be the perfect daughter who desperately wanted their approval about everything.”
She and her boyfriend tried to comfort each other, she says, “two grieving parents holding each other.” Pain, Grief, and Depression
After the abortion, Poulk was consumed with grief:
I laid in bed for what seemed like an eternity; my eyes could no longer produce tears from crying for days on end…
I felt like I was living in a nightmare… I was done, there was no reason to live anymore… I walked in darkness while carrying my pain and grief with no source of light in this world of depression.
Her parents went about life as if nothing had happened. She says, “I never understood how they could live a normal life while watching me drown in sorrow.” Turning to Religion for Help
Poulk sought comfort in her religion.
At first, sitting with her parents in church, faithfully keeping their secret, was “agonizing.” She says, “I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs in the middle of the crowded room to release my anger towards them.”
When the pastor called anyone who wanted prayer to come up to the altar, Paulk did. She had a powerful emotional experience and recommitted herself to her faith. Trapped in an Abusive Relationship
Meanwhile, Paulk was still dating her boyfriend. He was full of rage and became abusive.
He repeatedly punched her in the face and held her hostage in his apartment, only letting her go when her mother and sister came knocking on the door demanding to speak to her.
Even though Paulk had been committed to leaving him before, she says, “I couldn’t seem to escape no matter how strongly I felt about ending the relationship… I didn’t have the mental or emotional capacity to leave him.” A New Relationship, Marriage, and Helping Others
Finally, she met another man, and with his encouragement, ended the relationship. They are now married and the parents of three children.
Although it’s been 12 years since her abortion, Paulk still grieves for her baby.
She now runs a pro-life ministry dedicated to helping other young parents facing unplanned pregnancies.
Source: Claudia Paulk Merciful Grace: A Story of Regeneration through an Abortion (2023) 49, 54, 55, 56, 59, 62, 63, 63-64, 70, 68, 71, 73, 75, 85
A REAL Christian would do no such thing.
***
You are so right.
Lol ok then.
Had she had a different attitude, taking some responsibility for herself rather than blaming everyone else, I’d feel completely different. She displays nothing but narcissism.
Sorry. No sympathy for this girl.
As you have shown no sympathy, there will be none shown to you when you need it.
*****
AMEN TO WHAT YOU SAID.
My wife had an abortion before I met her, she was a teenager.
Abortion was not yet legal in this state, so her parents took her to a neighboring state to have one. The father was not a factor in any of this, and he got off scot free. My future in-laws forced her to have this done.
Fast forward a number of years, we got together, became serious about each other, and she confessed to me what had transpired.
I am pro-life, I always have been, so we had this discussion about it, and that’s when she confessed. She admitted her regrets about what happened, telling me that she would’ve had a son if the abortion hadn’t been performed.
I loved her then, AND I FORGAVE HER. It didn’t matter what happened in the past.
Today we have two adult daughters, one is married to a fine man, and the other is engaged to ANOTHER fine man, and we are very proud of both of them.
They know all about what their mother went through.
By the way, I was also the product, of a teen pregnancy in the ‘50s.
I thank God abortion wasn’t legal back then, I might not be here today.
My biological mother instead gave me up for adoption, and I was adopted when I was 5 months old. To this day I don’t know who my biological parents are, or were, but I forgave my biological mother for giving me up. She made the best decision she could.
I forgave my biological parents, and I FORGAVE MY WIFE.
Isn’t that part of what it means to be a Christian?
I’m assuming your AMEN wasn’t to my comments and that’s fine.
Very poignant story, and you, of course, did the right thing. I have a couple of friends who went through similar experiences.
I am extremely sympathetic and go out of my way to help people when needed....this is probably why I also receive grace and sympathy when I have something unfortunate happen to me.
I guess nobody is getting my point about the attitude of the girl writing the article, so I won’t bother trying to explain myself further.
Actually my AMEN wasn’t directed at you.
What Christian parent just smiles and thanks her daughter for informing her of her fornication? Any caring parent would be aghast.
Its amazing and immoral the reasons quoted in the article and the story you related being used to end a life.
I was well aware of that, and stated such.
you dont know squat, unless you were part of it. This story and your proof means nothing. You sound like some gossip monger. “I know this is true” you dont know anything. Lastly “Christians” dont do what was said in the story. This is plain anti-Christian click bait and all it does it show your anti-Christian bias. good day sir!
Years ago I got a new job and had to move a few states away. It took a few months to sell our house so I rented a room from a guy at my new church.
He came home one night and told me that he and his fiance had made a big mistake and that she was pregnant. She also went to the church with her parants.
He told me that he intended to stand before the church and confess his sin but that she was deathly afraid to go.
I replied with something like “I’m new here but I have the strong feeling that when you confess, there’s going to be a very sharp collective intake of breath from everyone, then the women of the church will surround your girlfriend with hugs and support. Not because you knocked her up, but because she is vulnerable now and needs them more than ever. God forgives.”
That’s exactly what happened.
Anybody can call themselves a “Christian”. However, the scripture says, “By their fruit you will know them.”
Odd. I’ve never head of preachers who make their kids get abortions. And since I’ve moved many times in my life, I’ve been in many churches.
Things not covered in the story include “What church?” Since many churches are apostate, that matters! Episcopal churches would probably PERFORM the abortion on her, or raise money to pay for her abortion! Catholic? Although formally against abortion, many Catholics are barely Catholic and are not Christians.
Race is not mentioned. Black have far more abortions (per woman) than whites and black churches are far more likely to turn a blind eye and also to never preach about abortion.
But Morgana, in 50+ years in Baptist churches - admittedly out West and not in the “Bible Belt” - I’ve never heard of pastors or deacons pushing kids to have abortions! I have known of them offering to raise a child themselves if the mother will NOT have an abortion, but I’ve never heard a whisper of a pastor forcing their child to get one!
The article reads like a hit piece against Christianity because it skips a lot of pertinent information. There are SOOOO many churches that are not remotely Christian in their beliefs, and it honestly sounds like something I’d expect to encounter in black or liberal churches.
Better Headline:
Christians Sin!
Shocker. They truly are human beings.
I believe it.
Look you know me. I’ve been posting these stories a long time, decades now. I’ve even talked to people who run Crisis Pregnancy Centers and other pro lifers who do sidewalk counseling.
Would it shock you to know that there are women in your church, maybe in the pew next to you who have had abortions?
It does not shock me at the least any more.
All I do is leave pamphlets for Rachel’s Vineyard and other post abortion help groups and in time they disappear, so I put out more.
I ask of you to do the same and see what happens. Don’t judge just pray for them.
Agree completely.
All religions, as well. Maybe 5% to 10% iin any literate religious group will have actually studied the scriptures and/or dogma of the religion they claim, and have made informed vows.
Wonderful testimony. You get it because you lived it. God bless you and your family.
I noticed the church’s identity was never mentioned. Perhaps because there wasn’t one, or perhaps it is on the WOKE side.
A real Christian family and church forgives the girl, and then bands together to help the girl through the pregnancy and the years until she marries.
Thanks.
JiC, some people are mature at 19 and some are not. Some people are not mature at 30. This girl already went through some type of loss of her biological father—the story (if we take it at face value) indicates that her stepfather is fully in control with the mother in making this declsion, even as a churchgoer; so her own father was not there to help her.
Surely this primal loss figured into her desire not to abandon her child; and even before that, psychologists have found that fatherless kids will seek to fill that void by engaging in sexual relations, often with a similarly immature partner. Yet when she told her mother she was sexually active, she received no counseling or even a constructive discussion from her mother.
This girl had probably been called upon to support her mother emotionally regarding the absent father, however that took place. Her self-involved mother critically neglected the girl’s home training and kept her untaught.
Her emotional age and desperate need to cling to her remaining biological parent to seek approval rather than go out into a world for which she was not prepared and hustle up funding, a place to live and prenatal services were completely beyond her maturity level, which with children of divorce or the death of a parent can be severely behind schedule.
Christianity is supposed to be about repentance, followed by forgiveness and reconciliation. Many posts above described better responses, such as giving the child up for adoption, which would have required the parents to ditch their self-righteous image and actually support their child in crisis. What she received instead was hypocrisy and punishment. A little baby who might have given joy to a childless couple was destroyed to preserve the parents’ pride. The teen mom is bearing the scars for a lifetime.
I’m just glad she found an understanding man and has been able to have children with him. And because she can never forget the one she felt forced to murder, she is on a mission to help other young mothers. Sounds like constructive atonement to me.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.