:^)
Posted on 12/24/2007 11:13:29 AM PST by al baby
AerotardNight Before Christmas:
'Twas the night before Christmas, and out on the ramp, Not an airplane was stirring, not even a Champ. The aircraft were fastened to tiedowns with care, In hopes that come morning, they all would be there.
The fuel trucks were nestled, all snug in their spots, With gusts from two-forty at 39 knots. I slumped at the fuel desk, now finally caught up, And settled down comfortably, resting my butt.
When the radio lit up with noise and with chatter, I turned up the scanner to see what was the matter. A voice clearly heard over static and snow, Called for clearance to land at the airport below.
He barked his transmission so lively and quick, I'd have sworn that the call sign he used was "St. Nick". I ran to the panel to turn up the lights, The better to welcome this magical flight.
He called his position, no room for denial, "St. Nicholas One, turnin' left onto final." And what to my wondering eyes should appear, But a Rutan-built sleigh, with eight Rotax Reindeer!
With vectors to final, down the glideslope he came, As he passed all fixes, he called them by name: "Now Ringo! Now Tolga! Now Trini and Bacun! On Comet! On Cupid!" What pills was he takin'?
While controllers were sittin', and scratchin' their head, They phoned to my office, and I heard it with dread, The message they left was both urgent and dour: "When Santa pulls in, have him please call the tower."
He landed like silk, with the sled runners sparking, Then I heard "Left at Charlie," and "Taxi to parking." He slowed to a taxi, turned off of three-oh And stopped on the ramp with a "Ho, ho-ho-ho..."
He stepped out of the sleigh, but before he could talk, I ran out to meet him with my best set of chocks. His red helmet and goggles were covered with frost And his beard was all blackened from Reindeer exhaust.
His breath smelled like peppermint, gone slightly stale, And he puffed on a pipe, but he didn't inhale. His cheeks were all rosy and jiggled like jelly, His boots were as black as a cropduster's belly.
He was chubby and plump, in his suit of bright red, And he asked me to "fill it, with hundred low-lead." He came dashing in from the snow-covered pump, I knew he was anxious for drainin' the sump.
I spoke not a word, but went straight to my work, And I filled up the sleigh, but I spilled like a jerk. He came out of the restroom, and sighed in relief, Then he picked up a phone for a Flight Service brief.
And I thought as he silently scribed in his log, These reindeer could land in an eighth-mile fog. He completed his pre-flight, from the front to the rear, Then he put on his headset, and I heard him yell, "Clear!"
And laying a finger on his push-to-talk, He called up the tower for clearance and squawk. "Take taxiway Charlie, the southbound direction, Turn right three-two-zero at pilot's discretion"
He sped down the runway, the best of the best, "Your traffic's a Grumman, inbound from the west." Then I heard him proclaim, as he climbed thru the night, "Merry Christmas to all! I have traffic in sight."
FredHead47; Finger Monkey; al baby; EveningStar ;jrios1968
:^)
Ping
Thanks Al...Merry Christmas
Mot exactly Naval Aviation, but I know for a fact St Nick has done a COD or two.
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Merry Christmas everyone!
Ping!
Thanks Al!
Aerotard? Thanks for posting the story.
Why would it matter?
Merry Christmas!
No one has ever tried to get fancy with one of the Big Birds, but there once was a Boeing test pilot who, in a moment of frivolity, took it into his head to execute a barrel roll in a 707. He made it, but he didn't exactly endear himself to his superiors. The consensus at Boeing seems to be that a 747 would probably survive a barrel roll, but to try it would be, and I quote, "an extremely foolish action."
The problem is not so much with the strength of the wings, which are designed to stand much greater pressures, as with the skill of the pilot. Enough forward speed must be maintained during the roll to compensate for the loss of lift that occurs when, in effect, the wings cease to function. That happens when the wings are perfectly perpendicular to the ground--in the vertical position, they can no longer hold the plane up. In a small plane, the problem is minimal: the wings spin out of the vertical position in a split second. But in a larger plane that takes longer to roll, the margin for error is increased, and the fatal moment could be stretched out enough to pull the plane down.
Looping a 747 or a DC-10 would be trickier still. (Bear in mind that a "roll" means you flip to the right or left; a "loop" is roughly analogous to a backwards somersault.) You'd have the problem of lift again, at the moment when the tail is down, but it would be harder to overcome, since the plane must be climbing, not merely maintaining its altitude, at the same time. One way to get a plane to climb is to make it go faster (increasing the speed increases the air pressure under the wings, which is what holds the plane up in the first place). But there's some doubt as to whether a 747 or a DC-10 could achieve enough forward speed to deliver the extra shot of lift that a loop would require. Boeing suspects its planes could make it, but since no one has ever been silly enough to try, there's no way of knowing for sure.
Pong!
And a shout out to numbah-one pilot son....
Merry Chrismas, Jack, have you seen this yet?
Merry Christmas, HiJinx!
Great little poem. Good stuff all around.
Jack.
Nearly every airplane can.
In the hands of a professional.
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