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Banana at large after fight with gorilla: Strongsville Police Blotter
Cleveland.com ^
| July 06, 2011
| Sun News staff
Posted on 07/06/2011 7:01:14 PM PDT by Daffynition
A bizarre assault call confirmed two things: Bananas do not like gorillas or the Verizon Wireless network. Just before 3 p.m. June 29, officers arrived at The Wireless Center at 14150 Pearl Road because the business’s advertising mascot, a gorilla, was attacked by a banana. Store management told police that an individual dressed as a banana tackled the businesses mascot. The banana-wearing perpetrator then fled on foot southbound on Pearl Road with four males. According to the store manager, the gorilla was not injured, just embarrassed. Police were unable to locate the banana.
TOPICS: Weird Stuff
KEYWORDS: napl
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To: Daffynition
It’s definitely the silly season...
2
posted on
07/06/2011 7:05:02 PM PDT
by
Ronin
("A society of sheep must in time beget a government of wolves" -- Bertrand de Jouve)
To: Daffynition
All points bulletin—be on the look out of a banana.
3
posted on
07/06/2011 7:11:43 PM PDT
by
WKUHilltopper
(And yet...we continue to tolerate this crap...)
To: Daffynition
I hope the gorilla recovers. Perhaps he could use some psychiatric care to ease the trauma.
4
posted on
07/06/2011 7:21:56 PM PDT
by
Cicero
(Marcus Tullius)
To: Daffynition
The gorilla’s lucky that a bunch of banana’s didn’t attack him. I suspect the banana’s name was Chiquita and it was in the country illegally.
5
posted on
07/06/2011 7:24:40 PM PDT
by
Waverunner
(I'd like to welcome our new overlords, say hello to my little friend)
To: Daffynition
Guess the gorilla didn’t find the banana too a-peeling.
6
posted on
07/06/2011 7:26:08 PM PDT
by
Fast Moving Angel
(If he has nothing to hide, why is he spending so much $$$ hiding it?)
To: Daffynition
OK, you get the post of the month.
7
posted on
07/06/2011 7:26:09 PM PDT
by
Defiant
(When Democrats lose voters, they manufacture new voters instead of convincing the existing voters.)
To: Daffynition
8
posted on
07/06/2011 7:30:16 PM PDT
by
Brandonmark
(2012: Our Hope IS Change!)
To: Daffynition
I don’t want to re hash this all night but was the banana being egged on?
9
posted on
07/06/2011 7:32:13 PM PDT
by
cripplecreek
(Remember the River Raisin! (look it up))
To: Fast Moving Angel
I think we are going to get a BUNCH of puns!!
10
posted on
07/06/2011 7:53:24 PM PDT
by
AEMILIUS PAULUS
(It is a shame that when these people give a riot)
To: Waverunner
11
posted on
07/06/2011 7:53:52 PM PDT
by
Daffynition
("Don't just live your life, but witness it also.")
To: Ronin
12
posted on
07/06/2011 7:55:06 PM PDT
by
Daffynition
("Don't just live your life, but witness it also.")
To: WKUHilltopper; Ronin
13
posted on
07/06/2011 7:58:36 PM PDT
by
Daffynition
("Don't just live your life, but witness it also.")
To: Brandonmark
14
posted on
07/06/2011 8:00:58 PM PDT
by
Daffynition
("Don't just live your life, but witness it also.")
To: Daffynition
15
posted on
07/06/2011 8:08:13 PM PDT
by
IYellAtMyTV
(Je t'aime, faire du bruit comme le cochon.)
To: Daffynition
To: Defiant
This story has a great deal of a-peel.
17
posted on
07/06/2011 8:21:42 PM PDT
by
Daffynition
("Don't just live your life, but witness it also.")
To: Daffynition
A-peeling to all horse whisperers: Do you know any gorilla whisperers? Need help asap.
To: Daffynition
A banana a day = .01 millirem or 1 bde. Thank God the gorilla wsn't exposed to more or Cleveland could have had a real ape of a problem.
19
posted on
07/07/2011 1:28:55 AM PDT
by
Waverunner
(I'd like to welcome our new overlords, say hello to my little friend)
To: Daffynition
I have no idea what you are talking about, so here's a gorilla wearing a banana hammock.
20
posted on
07/07/2011 1:44:26 AM PDT
by
Pylon
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