Posted on 06/25/2012 3:32:21 AM PDT by barmag25
What better way to start off a Monday than waking up to some Chuck Norris Facts! Enjoy!
The only reason why any hurricanes actually reach the United States coastline is due to a conflict in Chuck Norris' schedule.
Children are warned not to run with scissors. Scissors are warned not to run with Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris is going to be 1 year old in 2012
Chuck Norris is the missing link
If Chuck Norris' beard were an animal, it would undoubtedly have zero natural predators and every living organism would be its natural prey.
Bill Gates owes Chuck Norris money
Lightning never strikes twice in one place because Chuck Norris is looking for it.
Chuck Norris can do the y.m.c.a with both hands down by his side
Once Chuck Norris chewed up a gold bar and a chocolate bar, then he spit out Mr. T
The only way to make diamond powder is to rub the diamond on Chuck Norris's skin.
(Excerpt) Read more at chucknorrisfacts.com ...
When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had 3 missed calls from Chuck Norris
Fear of spiders is aracnaphobia, fear of tight spaces is chlaustraphobia, fear of Chuck Norris is called Logic
Chuck Norris can jump out of a bottomless pit.
Chuck Norris doesn’t call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.
Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. The bear isn’t dead it is just afriad to move.
Ghosts sit around the campfire and tell Chuck Norris stories.
Chuck Norris can play a drum solo on the guitar
touche
But Christopher Lee got to boff the prom queens...
;-)
Chuck Norris once lit a fart in the Great Sahara Rain Forest.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
Death once had a near-Chuck Norris experience
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn’t nearly foolish enough to attack him.
Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.
Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its decendants are known today as Giraffes.
Chuck Norris once got bit by a rattle snake........ After three days of pain and agony ..................the rattle snake died
Superman wears Chuck Norris PJs to bed.
Too much laughter on a Monday morning! LOL!
Chuck Norris can post to Free Republic using an abacus.
Chuck Norris went to North Torrance H.S. (the Saxons!) as did ESPN’S Chris Mortensen and William Bonin (the Freeway Killer).
Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his father did.
Chuck Norris can post on FR just by lurking.
Chuck Norris looked at the DU website and everyone signed in there peed their pants at the same time.
Chuck Norris is in the new Expendebles 2 movie. I read that he had them write out the F-word from the script, in order to get a PG-13 rating. Seriously.
Chuck Norris sandpapered a wildcat’s ass in a telephone booth.
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