IBTP
3 or maybe 4
Top ten!!
That's just plain silly!
Top 10? Early today?
top 10!
The Obama Administration: Still the silliest thing on the OFST.
The Republicans once again make the mistake of changing the course of the boat now accepting the Democrats promise to raise the height of the river later.
Sounds legit.
When it comes to the so-called “fiscal cliff” both parties are beginning to remind me of the man in Gone With The Wind who was getting a leg amputated: “I CAN’T STAND IT! PLEASE, DON’T CUT! DON’T CUT! (incoherent screaming)”
“Texas executes last remaining citizen.”
LMAO
WOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOO top 50
WHEN THE GUY STOPS RUNNING, PLACE YOUR CURSOR ABOUT
1 INCH ABOVE HIS HEAD...
Click here: http://www.selfcontrolfreak.com/pakken.html
It’s probably been posted before, but a friend just sent it to me:
FORREST GUMP GOES TO HEAVEN
The day finally arrived. Forrest Gump dies and goes to Heaven...
He is at the Pearly Gates, met by St. Peter himself.
However, the gates are closed, and Forrest approaches the gatekeeper.
St. Peter said, ‘Well, Forrest, it is certainly good to see you. We have heard a lot about you.
I must tell you, though, that the place is filling up fast, and we have been administering an entrance examination for everyone.
The test is short, but you have to pass it before you can get into Heaven.’
Forrest responds, ‘It sure is good to be here, St.. Peter, sir. But nobody ever told me about any entrance exam. I
sure hope that the test ain’t too hard. Life was a big enough test as it was.’
St.. Peter continued, ‘Yes, I know, Forrest, but the test is only three questions.
First:
What two days of the week begin with the letter T?
Second:
How many seconds are there in a year?
Third:
What is God’s first name?’
Forrest leaves to think the questions over.
He returns the next day and sees St. Peter, who waves him up, and says, ‘Now that you have had a chance to think the questions over, tell me your answers.’
Forrest replied, ‘Well, the first one — which two days in the week begins with the letter ‘T’? Shucks, that one
is easy. That would be Today and Tomorrow..’
The Saint’s eyes opened wide and he exclaimed, ‘Forrest, that is not what I was thinking, but you do have a point, and I guess I did not specify, so I will give you credit
for that answer. How about the next one?’ asked St. Peter.
‘How many seconds in a year?’
Now that one is harder,’ replied Forrest, ‘but I thunk and thunk about that, and I guess the only answer can be twelve.’
Astounded, St. Peter said, ‘Twelve? Twelve?! Forrest, how in Heaven’s name could you come up with twelve seconds in a year?’
Forrest replied, ‘Shucks, there’s got to be twelve:
January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd... ‘
‘Hold it,’ interrupts St. Peter. ‘I see where you are going with this, and I see your point, though that was
not quite what I had in mind....but I will have to give you credit for that one, too.
Let us go on with the third and final question. Can you tell me God’s first name’?
‘Sure,’ Forrest replied, ‘it’s Andy.’
‘Andy?’ exclaimed an exasperated and frustrated St. Peter.
‘Ok, I can understand how you came up with your answers to my first two questions, but just how in the world did you
come up with the name Andy as the first name of God?’
‘Shucks, that was the easiest one of all,’ Forrest replied. ‘I learnt it from the song,
ANDY WALKS WITH ME,
ANDY TALKS WITH ME,
ANDY TELLS ME I AM HIS OWN.’
St. Peter opened the Pearly Gates,
and said: ‘Run, Forrest, run.’
